Dropped Call
by castlefan6
Summary: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769.
1. Chapter 1

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 1**

 **Previously (Courtesy of Dust Jackets . Com )**

MONTGOMERY: So Roger was right about being followed that night.

BECKETT: Well, when the husband got on to the affair, he did a little spy game of his own. Tracked down and killed his wife's lover.

MONTGOMERY: Mmm. Two affairs, a loveless marriage. It's sad a man had to die because all the people involved were too scared to say what they really felt.

BECKETT: Yes, it is sad.

CASTLE (on cell)

And how many shows like that? Sure. Make it two, and you got a deal. All right. (hangs up) Hey, I gotta run. I gotta drive Alexis to Princeton. But I will be back in time for that little surprise party the boys are throwing for me... What? What?

BECKETT

Nothing.

CASTLE

Okay. I'll see you.

BECKETT

Mm-hmm.

 **Few Minutes later**

DEMMING  
It's not just this weekend we're talking about, is it?

BECKETT  
No.

DEMMING  
No. Was it something I said, Kate? Something I did?

BECKETT  
No, you're great. You're really great, and I really like you. It's just, I don't think that this is what I'm looking for right now.

DEMMING  
Well, what is it you're looking for, Kate?

Rick is relieved to be out of the station for a few hours, he won't have to witness the clingy, kissy face Becket and Demming, not even trying to be discrete anymore. Maybe it was for the best, she had fought every attempt, even when tempered with his family there to be anything more than work friends, well he was a friend to her, she was more a colleague.

This was the time he could really use a friend, someone who would listen to him, not just blow him off with the pretend to care attitude. He's taking his little girl to Princeton, yeah it was just a program for Seniors but God she had grown up too fast. Thinking back, she was really the only good consistent thing that had been in his life, hell she was his life, and everyone knew it.

He hated lies, but sometimes it was better to stretch the truth a bit, to allow those you love a bit of worry-free time to live their lives. As soon as the party was over, he was headed not to the Hamptons as he had told everyone, but to Toronto for the start of his treatment.

He had to be there by tomorrow or he would lose his spot in the Clinical Trial, and God knows he was willing to try anything for a cure from this cancer they just found in his routine physical last week. Mother was in England for the entire summer and this 6-week program for Alexis was timed perfectly for his need to be in treatment.

He really had hoped that he would be able to catch Kate in a friendly moment, to at least let her know that if bad did in fact turn to worse, would she honor the agreement to take care of Alexis as she had promised.

Sadly, that hadn't happened, so he would have to take her at her word, and just to be safe had is attorney modify his will to name Uncle Bob as Alexis knew him, his honor Mayor Robert Weldon as a backup in case Kate needed and out.

As they travelled to Princeton, Alexis was full of conversation, so it wasn't hard to keep a cheery outlook on his face and respond with his "not till you're thirty" comments about her and boys.

Deep inside he wondered, was this the last time he would be able to take a trip with his little girl? Cancer or not, she would be gone to college soon, and far too old to hang around with the "Cool Dad" as she used to refer to him as. All too soon they were pulling into the Princeton Parking lot following signs welcoming the Senior Program and directing traffic.

"Well pumpkin, guess this is it," he said a short time later once she had been registered and assigned a room, "You have a great time, and I'm not sure when I'll call, you know you can call me and I'll return it as soon as I can, OK?"

"Thanks Daddy, I appreciate you not keeping close tabs on me, I mean I know I'm still a kid, but I have to learn to stand up for myself sooner or later, I mean as much as I want it I know you won't live forever"

Ricks face flushes as he fights back the tears, "No Pumpkin, you're right, Old Dad won't be around forever and you do need to be independent, so yeah have fun and I'll talk to you when I can OK?"

"Dad, I know it's been awhile but could you, you know, check*"

"Oh, Of course," as he gets down on his knees, shines the flashlight app from his cell phone under the bed, and then looks up at his little girl with love in his eyes, "All Clear Baby, no Monsters,"

"Are you sure?" Alexis teases

"Yep Dad's sure, you have a good six weeks and don't worry about me, you know how I get when I get in the zone, just have fun and learn something, OK? If you need anything and you can't get me, Call Paula she'll track me down."

"You want me to call Paula, not Detective Beckett Dad?" What Happened?"

"Nothing happened Sweetie, Paula just has my calendar and Detective Beckett will just have to call her anyway, this way you get in touch with me faster."

"OK, yeah, that makes sense. I promise I'll only call in an emergency, so you try to have fun as well Dad." As she kisses him on the cheek, Rick mumbles see you soon as he makes a quick walk to the door holding back his tears, Alexis says OK Dad, as she is facing the window trying hard not to let her tears fall either.

Rick wipes the tears from his eyes trying not to think that this was the last time he would have a moment with his daughter, and finally makes it back to his car. He sits for a moment to compose himself, then marks the first item off of his list, next is the party he really didn't want to go to, but Espo and Ryan had worked so hard trying to keep it quiet.

Rick actually felt sorry for Javi as he battled everyday not to let details slip, it was just his nature to tell the world, any and all information he heard. How he became a cop was still a mystery, must have had laryngitis that week of interview Rick smiled. Traffic heading back to the city was growing heavier and finally came to a complete standstill. A motorcycle Cop was making his way slowly down the berm, as Rick called out, "What's the problem Officer, we haven't moved in over a half hour?

"I'm sorry sir, but we have a truck jackknifed across the road, and a multiple car accident that Fire and Rescue is in route, I just came from shutting off the on ramps, looks like you're going to be here at least 3-4 more hours." Great just great, now he would miss most if not all of the party,

Bringing out his cell phone, he tries Beckett's phone straight to voice mail, her office line was already transferred to Karpowski and he got her VM as well. His signal is weak, probably because everyone on the 5 miles of freeway shut down were trying to reach someone, so in desperation he called Paula's number.

"What's up Ricky" comes the nasal tone

"Paula, I'm stuck in traffic on my way back from taking Alexis to Princeton, you have to call the Precinct, and let them know."

"Ricky, you're breaking up, I got traffic jam, call precinct, Princeton"

Rick yells the message again, and just as he completes it, he hears Paula

"I'll call them to tell them you're in traffic, then the call drops"

Rick looking at his phone no bars, then the No Signal indicator lights up. He steps back into his car, and hooks the battery charger to the phone, when it's fully charged he has moved less than 1,000 yards, so he turns the phone off and decides, he'll head for Toronto tonight, this was a sign from the universe telling him to get there early. He'll send the boys tickets or let them use the Ferrari to make up for it, but this was more important.

 **12** **th** **Precinct**

 **Same Time Frame,**

Kate has just watched Demming walk away, after she had broken up with him, God she hoped she had done the right thing. Castle was due back here any minute, so she could ask for another chance to accept his invitation, like she should have done the first time.

She walked into the conference room where the party was being held except it looked more like a wake than a party.

"What's going on and where's Castle" she asked, "Trust him to be late for his own going away party" she laughs trying to lighten the mood,

Lanie just looks at her, then Ryan, and finally Espo speaks up, "Paula called, just said he's not coming, got something else more important."

"More important than saying Good Bye to his friends? That pompous ass, you worked hard on this, and that was just crap he did that."

"Well Kate, if you hadn't paraded the Boy Toy in front of him and made sure he saw you two making out in the stairwell like high school students we wouldn't be having this party to begin with." Espo spits out.

Her face burns with anger, "Espo, you're way out of line, and what and who I do it with is none of your business"

"Kate, it may not be his, but when you do it in my house, it makes it my business, and Espo's right, the last few weeks you've gone out of your way to put Castle down, and parade the badge bunny from downstairs in his face." Montgomery is pissed, more pissed than she's seen him in a while.

"I haven't done any such thing, I mean if I want to have a relationship with someone, what business of it is it of anyone here,"

Montgomery is steamed now and it shows, "You're damn lucky I didn't suspend you Beckett, I thought you'd come to your senses, but fraternizing with any fellow member of this precinct requires permission from your CO, in case you forgot, that's me and I sure as hell didn't give you permission to go acting like school kids on a God Damn Homicide floor for Christ Sakes."

The party is quickly over, and Kate feels like she has been attacked for no reason, especially from her boys, they didn't stick up for her, they always defend her. Lanie was too busy to take her call, so it looks like she pissed everyone off, and now Rick was too busy to come back for his own party? Did he know that when he left, why didn't he just say something instead of letting them think he would be back?

 **Castles Loft**

 **7 hours later**

Rick stumbles through the door completely exhausted from the stop and go traffic and the horrific scene all the drivers had to pass, someone had to be killed in that accident. He finally got his wireless signal back after rebooting his phone several times, it had shut down when his battery had been so low and required a hard start to turn back on. He reaches and dials,

"Paula, Rick, what did they say about me missing the party?"

"Rick, I couldn't get through to Beckett, or the two detectives, Captain Montgomery was in a meeting and couldn't be disturbed so I talked to LT, or LR or whatever he hell his name was, just told him you couldn't make it, that's all I could make out on your call."

"Paula, tell me exactly what you said, and his name is LT, "

"I told him you just called, and you were stuck, the call dropped you called back and said you couldn't make it, he asked if you had something else to do, and I said I guess, apparently he's not there."

"God Damn it Paula, I was stuck in traffic for 6 hours on the LIE where three were killed earlier, why the hell did you say that I had something else to do?"

"Well Rick you called 5 times and all 5 times I got one word before the calls dropped, what was I supposed to do? Beckett was already gone, so I figured you were coming back to see her so what was the point"

"Yeah, you're right Paula, what's the point. Listen I'm gonna be off grid for the next few weeks, it's a family thing I need to take care of so use the burner cell ONLY in case of emergencies, and Paula, Gina wanting a fucking update is not an emergency, Clear?"

"Crystal Rick, hope things work out, call me if you need me for anything"

"Well if Alexis needs something, she'll call you, then you call my burner OK? I'll see you when I get back"

"Hey Rick, just remember I love you, I know you will never love me, but I'm here."

"Thanks Paula, I do love you, just not the way you want, go live your life, it's way too short, talk soon," then the line goes dead.

A/N The prompt that got this started is below, thanks not sure how long or where this will go but we'll give it a go in between Love's Journey 4

kato769 chapter 17. Oct 23

I've always wondered, if there was a story to be told, if Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect?


	2. Chapter 2

Dropped Call

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 2**

 **Previously**

" _Yeah, you're right Paula, what's the point. Listen I'm gonna be off grid for the next few weeks, it's a family thing I need to take care of so use the burner cell ONLY in case of emergencies, and Paula, Gina wanting a fucking update is not an emergency, Clear?"_

" _Crystal Rick, hope things work out, call me if you need me for anything"_

 **Castle's Loft**

 **4:00 AM Next Day**

Rick was up, showered and had a cup of coffee and bagel before 3:00 AM, he was still exhausted from his trip yesterday, but he wanted to get an early start. He had set the auto timers to on, controlling temps, lights and security system to be manned 24/7, as well as packing the remainder of bagels and coffee for the road. His answering machine reverted automatically to the standard greeting, and he synched his regular phone with his Cloud account, only taking the burner phone that only Paula had the number for.

His first appointment was at 6:00 PM but after yesterday, he wasn't letting anything stand in his way. This was his best course of treatment, if it worked there would be little if any side effects, if it were unsuccessful, well he just wasn't prepared to go there yet. He was still haunted by the look on his friend and physician's face as he came into the exam room with the lab results.

Gregg DeLeaver had been a friend of Rick's since the first day of college, when Rick befriended the lost freshman, and actually bought his lunch. Gregg's family made Martha and Rick look like millionaires and needless to say it was all they could do to manage the essentials, even with Gregg's full scholarship.

"So, what you gonna be when you graduate Gregg, some politician, or Labor Leader to change the world?" Rick had asked him early on in his friendship.

"Nope, gonna be an Oncologist so I can help as many people in the work kick Cancer's Ass. It took my Pop, and his Pop, and will probably take me if I don't keep screened and stay away from the triggers like tobacco, and other drugs."

Well his friend had struggled but his dream had come true, and when he graduated, Rick was fresh off a best seller, so Rick, being Rick, bought Gregg's first office space and all the equipment he would need, letting him begin his practice debt free. When Gregg argued, Rick came back with hey, if I ever need your service, I get the Special Treatment and the debt is paid. Gregg reluctantly agreed, and neither friend would ever suspect things would play out as they had.

 **FLASHBACK**

 **Three Weeks Earlier**

 _Rick had gone for his annual physical, mostly to avoid the nagging of his daughter, but also because his good friend Gregg, an Oncologist by specialty, still had a small practice in Internal Medicine for his close friends, and once Gregg called there was no getting him to back off. His voicemail left do doubt of the limits he would go to insure his friends were healthy:_

" _Rick, get your ass, and the other parts of you into my office next Tuesday or I will tell TMZ about Dorothy Merz, you do know her husband is an ex UFC fighter, don't you? Call me back with the time you're coming in, later Gregg"_

 _Rick called and made the appointment for 10:30AM the next Tuesday and everything seemed to be going well,_

" _Let's grab lunch while your labs are processing Rick, shouldn't take that long and you can get out of here"_

" _Sounds good to me Gregg, any place special you go", as Rick headed to the Hot Dog vendor outside the office and Gregg firmly steers him toward a sit-down restaurant offering a variety of dishes. Since it was early, especially for Rick, he went with the house salad, rather than his normal cheeseburger with cheese fries and a strawberry shake._

" _Nice try buddy but I got your lab numbers coming to me shortly, and I know how much you love your greasy foods. You do need to lose 5-10 lbs., but I'm guessing the late-night meals with the Detectives are one cause of that,"_

" _Well we won't have to worry about that much longer, I'm pretty much done with that research so now I can get back to the gym my regular once or twice a quarter", as they both laugh._

" _Well some of us have schedules Rick, shall we get back, so we can get you on your way?"_

" _Sure thing, ready when you are Gregg," as Gregg motions for the check, the server comes over and said "it's all taken care of sir, and thank you for your generosity,"_

" _I'm going to have to remember to prepay the next time we go out, seriously Rick, I can afford it now, it's not like back in college."_

" _I know Gregg, but I do things that make me happy, and paying for that made me happy, enough said" as they reached the office._

" _Go on in Rick, I'm just going to grab your lab results and be right in," as Rick enters the exam room once again. In a few minutes he hears Gregg talking through the door, and he's angry,_

" _Well check them again, and when you're done with that check those again, and I'm sending down a fresh sample and I don't want your Jr. Techs touching this, you handle this, you understand?"_

" _Sorry Rick as he enters the exam room once again, we're gonna have to run the blood tests again, so I'll have the nurse in to draw in a moment,"_

 _Another set of blood vials are personally walked to the lab on the floor below by Dr. DeLeaver and the Supervisor runs the exams personally. It is a shell shocked and almost speechless Dr. DeLeaver who entered the exam room, no one had to tell Rick the news was not good._

" _OK Gregg, let's have it buddy, I heard you yelling through the door, and your assistant said you walked the new samples to the lab personally, so level with me, how bad is it?"_

" _Well Rick the official term is_ _ **adenocarcinoma**_ _of the prostate, or just prostate cancer, yours is somewhere between_ _Stage III: where your PSA levels are high, the tumor is_ _ **growing**_ _, or the cancer is high grade. These all indicate a locally advanced cancer that is likely to grow and spread, and Stage IIIA: The cancer has spread beyond the outer layer of the prostate into nearby tissues."_

" _Ok Gregg, so what does that mean, do we go home and check our bucket list, or is there a treatment that we can do?"_

" _Rick, normal treatments include chemo, and radiation, they are painful and will cause you to lose your hair, plus chronic fatigue among other side effects,"_

" _No, No, way Gregg, sounds like the treatment is worse than the damn disease."_

" _The survival rate for this is between 29% and 56% BUT I have a colleague in Canada who has a clinical trial that has shown remarkable results, it's 4 weeks of hormone and cell reprogramming, in a sense teaching the good cells of your body to attack the cancer from within, he has over a 75% success rate, but the program is only approved in Canada, the FDA still has it's head stuck up their ass here"_

" _How long is the treatment in Canada Gregg, and how long do I have if it doesn't work?"_

" _Well Rick, let's take the positive one first, the program is 4 weeks, but you must live in Toronto, and be available at the hospital 16 hours each day, the regimen is on three days, off 1 then decreasing to two days and finally to one day on and one day off for a week, then we do the labs again, if it works your cancer should go from a stage 3 to high PSA counts and continued follow ups for a year can result in a full cure."_

" _And if it fails Gregg, how long do I have?"_

" _About a year Rick, that's quality time, you may linger for 2-3 but not life as you know it or want. Let's get that call to my colleague and get you started OK?"_

" _You're the boss Gregg, just tell me what I need to do."_

 **Present Time,**

 **In Route to Toronto Ontario**

Rick is amazed at how light the traffic is, especially after sitting in a used car parking lot or so it seemed for most of yesterday afternoon. He thought of Kevin and Javi, and reminded himself to send them something when he got settled in, he wasn't in the mood to text or talk, so he would just text Paula to send over tickets to the next home game, along with a full apology that he was stuck in traffic in the accident, they surely heard about that so they knew it was legit.

He sailed right along, clearing customs without issue, and then headed into the city of Toronto, he had forgotten how beautiful the city really was. He had about 3 hours before his first appointment, so he decided to treat himself to something he probably would not be allowed to have after he began his treatment, Poutine, with a Maple Walnut Shake.

He pulled into the restaurant that was flashing the sign Best Poutine in Canada and went in,

"Welcome to Trey's diner, how many sir?"

Rick looked around and said, "Just me and my little friend here, pointing to each shoulder" no reason you still couldn't still have fun, he wasn't dead yet.

"So that would be two sir? The confused waiter asked, then broke into a laugh,

"Thanks for going along with it, I've had a long drive and needed to hear laughter"

"I totally understand Sir, Right this way"

Rick takes his seat and is greeted by a beautiful brunette who should be gracing the cover of a magazine, not serving food in a diner.

"Good evening sir, I'm Trey, I own this diner, what can I get for you tonight?"

"I'd like a double order of the Poutine and a Maple Walnut shake, large please, going out in style so I may as well enjoy it." She looks funny, then thinks as she says,

"You wouldn't be here to start a trial program at the hospital down the street would you sir? Because if you are, I highly recommend something lighter, a lot lighter for the first few weeks.

Rick is a bit shocked, "You know of the clinical trials going on down the street?"

She smiles and says "Yes, but not how you think, I assure you I'm 100% female, but they have a mirror trial going of for women with Cervical Cancer, I start my program tonight at 6:00 PM"

"Well, I start mine the same time, how rude, I'm Rick, eh Rick Rogers and thanks for the heads up, I have enough problems I don't need to add the nausea to them"

"Exactly, I'll bring you something soft, but nourishing, be right back."

She returned a few minutes later with a soft scrambled egg, and one piece of Poutine, minus the heavy gravy, and as she sat it down, asked

"Do you mind if I join you Rick, it's nice to know one friendly face going through this and I haven't eaten yet either"

"Please sit, Trey, My God where did my manners go, I'm so sorry" as he stands and pulls out her chair for her to seat her.

A slight blush, comes across her face, but she looks into his deep blue eyes and whispers, "Thank You, we don't see many gentlemen in here, sorry to say."

"Well it's their loss, do you live around here, or do you have to drive a long way to get to treatment?"

"Actually, I live over an hour away, so I'm going to be bunking in the back room for treatment, so I don't have to impose"

"Trey, I know you don't know me, and we just met, but I have a two Bedroom Suite at the Orion Hotel, you are more than welcome to use one of the rooms, I can even have the key cards changed to protect you, if that would make you feel safer, and you can check my references at the hotel, I just don't want you to have to worry about where you're going to stay during treatment."

Trey blushes, and replied, "Why are you being so nice, I mean you don't know me at all, I could be the criminal, and you invite me into your place, Why?"

"The same reason you wouldn't let me make myself sick, It's the right thing to do for your fellow man. All I ask is that you try it for one night, tonight, and if you want to leave OK, no hard feelings, but you're right, I haven't been able to talk with anyone about this either, it's nice to meet someone who understands what's at stake."

She calls one of her workers over and speaks in French, " _Prenez une photo de cet homme, si je ne me présente pas au travail demain, il est le dernier avec lequel je serai » rough translation ment :_ Taka a Picture of This man, If I Don't show up for work tomorrow, He Is the last one I Will Be With,

Rick listens to her then responds with: _S'il vous plait, gardez ma carte d'identité, juste pour prouver que je veux dire aucun dommage, Orion Hotel Penthouse est l'endroit où nous serons dans des pièces séparées,_

Meaning Please keep my ID, just to prove I mean no harm, Orion Hotel Penthouse is where we will be in separate rooms, as he hand his Driver's license over to the young lady.

Trey smiles, "You are full of surprises Rick, why didn't you tell me you spoke French,"

"And miss all the fun that just happened, not on our lives", he laughs.

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada**

She feels an instant comfort come over her, and accepts Ricks proposal, including to have the front desk issue a separate key card for her quarters. They head to the hotel get checked in, since Rick is more than VIP no questions are asked as Trey brings her suitcase through the door, Rick just motions and a valet is picking it up and loading it on Rick's luggage cart.

They settle into the Penthouse, and join each other in the main den area, they still have about an hour to kill, before it's time to head to the hospital, so they take the opportunity to get acquainted and learn of each other's prognosis.

 **Beckett's Apartment**

 **4:00 AM Same Day**

Kate had gone home, pissed at Castle, even more pissed that she was on the receiving end of some blistering comments by Roy and Espo, and decided to have a drink. About 5 more she thought it would be a good idea to call Rick and let him know just what a piece of crap he was for skipping out on his own surprise party.

She dials his cell phone and it goes to voice mail, but the message is different, Kate is too far gone to hear the change, to I will be unavailable for the near future, critical issues should be directed to my publicist Paula Haas, all others please leave a voice mail and I will return your call as soon as possible.

Just like him, Chicken Shit, turn his phone off so he won't have to listen to her, so she tries the landline, this time she is shocked with the message she receives, "I'm sorry you are calling from a number this subscriber has blocked, please hang up and refrain from calling again, your calls are monitored and prosecution will be pursued for any additional harassment."

This really sets her off, harassment, that bastard claims harassment after all the time working, needling his way into her life, her job, her friends, so she calls his cell phone, waits for the beep, and unloads a message of vile, vulgar profanities, that Charlie Sheen would have been proud of, and continues till the machine clicks off. Satisfied, she slumps down on her couch and passes out.

She will remember leaving a voice mail the next day, but not what she said, although it will change the dynamic of three people's lives dramatically, since it was captured in the cloud, for Rick to hear in it's entirety.

TBC

A/N If any of the French is incorrect it's on Google Translate since I don't speak French, another take on Season 2 ending, it seems we just can't get enough of the early years.


	3. Chapter 3

Dropped Call

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 3**

 **Previously**

"Actually, I live over an hour away, so I'm going to be bunking in the back room for treatment, so I don't have to impose"

"Trey, I know you don't know me, and we just met, but I have a two Bedroom Suite at the Orion Hotel, you are more than welcome to use one of the rooms, I can even have the key cards changed to protect you, if that would make you feel safer, and you can check my references at the hotel, I just don't want you to have to worry about where you're going to stay during treatment."

Trey blushes, and replied, "Why are you being so nice, I mean you don't know me at all, I could be the criminal, and you invite me into your place, Why?"

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada One Hour Later**

"Rick, I don't mean to rush you, I have enjoyed talking to you, but we better head off to the hospital, we don't want to be late for the first day."

"Of course, I have a car waiting for us, downstairs"

"Rick, it's only three blocks, why do we need a car?"

"Because we have no idea of how we're going to feel and how long our sessions will last tonight, and I want to be sure we have enough energy fighting the cancer, not walking"

"That's really sweet of you, but you are going to run out of money if you keep spending like this, I can share the expense I mean I have a little saved up?"

"Trey, I realize Health Care is different here than in New York, but there is still the fact you are going to be losing time at work, so let me take care of it, there's no additional expense on my part whether it's one or two, OK?"

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

They share the ride to the hospital, and enter the main hall together, it was a comfort to know that Trey was by his side, going through something very similar, and hopefully he could help her as well.

The session starts off with a slide presentation showing the general process of how cells are coaxed into fighting cancer cells within a patients own body, rather than the Rat Poisoning, and Radiation the kills both good and cancerous cells and wreaks havoc on the entire body, which when the next slide comes into focus, it was the typical regimen of Chemotherapy and Radiation treatments which are the conventional manner of treatment.

Rick can tell that Trey is upset so he gently takes her hand into his and pats the outside of their joined hands in a reassuring manner. He expected her to pull away, but instead she places her other hand on top of his, and gently squeezes an appreciative thanks. The speaker has reached the end of his part of the presentation, so there is a 15-minute break and punch and cookies were being served in the back of the room. Rick excuses himself and returns with two cookies for Trey and a glass of punch, for each of them.

"No Cookies for you Rick?" Trey asks as her beautiful eyes say Thank You.

"No, the doctor wants me to drop 5-10 pounds and I'd like to think I had something to do with it before the treatments kick in."

"Wow, I never knew that conventional treatments were so harsh on the body," Trey whispers,

"I know, I went to school with my Oncologist, one of my best friends, and he suggested this trial, he knew I wouldn't tolerate the conventional treatment."

"So, who knows you are here Rick, besides your Doctor, anyone left at home to worry about you?" she asks quietly.

"Well I have a daughter who is a Senior in High School but is away at Princeton for 6 weeks, and my Mother is an actress performing in London for Summer Stock, but neither do or can know I'm here, how about you?"

"Just my little brother, you saw him at the restaurant, he's the one that played along with your joke, his name is Jacques, but we call him Jack. I noticed you said daughter, her mother is not in the picture, and please feel free to ignore me if I get too personal"

"No, that's fine, Alexis is my daughter, and it's been just us two since she was 4 months old, her Mom choice an acting career over motherhood, and her casting director over her husband so it's just us. Mother moved in last year after getting taken by her boyfriend for her life's savings, then he was gone, but she is more like a ghost, we never know when she is going to be home" he laughs.

"You can't tell me that a beautiful women like yourself is single?"

"Recent development, I was married for 3 years, till I lost the baby and we found the cervical cancer, so it was too much for my ex, so he's out of the picture now, divorce was final 11 months ago."

"Trey, I'm so sorry, I didn't know I should have kept my big mouth shut."

"Hey, it was me that started the 500 questions not you, anyway I'm better without him, he cheated on me, and didn't like to work so he's someone else's problem now.

To be honest, the only reason the marriage last that long was I'm catholic and my Mom was alive till last year, so if I filed oh my God, now I am free of the jerk and Mom isn't here to witness the mortal sin," she laughs

The session begins again, and now the women are separated from the men, as each disease, Prostate and Cervical cancers are explained in greater detail to each group. Rick was impressed by the level of detail, the scientists had included and how simplistic they had made the concept, easy to understand a very complex issue they would be undergoing starting tomorrow at 7:00 AM.

The session for the women ran a little longer so Rick took the opportunity to check his voice mails on his regular cell via the Cloud, there were the usual ones from Gina, and one from Paula wishing him luck, then a couple of hang ups from Beckett, then WOW, did he get an earful. The nicest comment she made was he was a fucking weasel who had inserted himself into her life, and he couldn't even make it back to a surprise party the boys worked so hard on, and he spoiled her surprise as well, then the message cut off as she filled the space with vulgarity, and just nasty vile comments.

He had been so surprised and shocked with Kate's outburst, and how she really felt about him, he didn't see Trey walk up in front of him till she took his hand.

"Hey Roomie, you ready to head home, sorry our session ran long,"

"No Problem, just checking voice mails, and trying to keep my head above water back in New York"

"Yeah, I bet Gina Cowell is all over your butt to finish the next novel before you start the intense treatments isn't, she?"

"Trey, you knew, when how, I mean"

"Rick your VIP card in the suite says Rick Castle Best Selling Author, not Rick Rogers but I understand."

"Are you sure, because I didn't lie to you, my name is really Richard Rogers, especially for all of this Medical stuff, I just have to be careful, I'm sorry."

"Hey, it's OK, let's get back to the room and compare notes, I got to be back at 7:00 so I hope you do as well"

"Yep I sure do, so let's get to the room, order room service now that we can eat till midnight, then we can talk, about the real stuff, OK?"

She surprises him by stepping up on her tip toes and kissing him on the cheek, "You're just too darn nice Rick, sounds perfect."

 **Meanwhile Back in NYC**

 **Beckett's Apartment**

 **9:00 AM Same Day**

Beckett wakes with one of the worst hangovers and headaches she has had in years. She has vague glimpses of what she did once she got home, and the empty vodka bottle laying on the floor in front of her couch, her still dressed in yesterday's work clothes, and he phone lying open on the floor are good clues to figure out what the hell she had done.

Just as she is about to pick her phone up, it rings with Lanie's ring tone.

"Girl are you awake yet, you called me at 4:00 in the morning telling me how much of a douche bag Castle was and you were going to call his cell back and leave him a piece of your mind, even if it was on voice mail. Please tell me you didn't do that Kate, because if you did, we may never hear from Rick again."

"I don't know Lanes, I may have, I don't remember too much, I do remember calling his land line and the Son of a bitch has me blocked, do you believe that he blocked my calls."

"Yeah Kate, I can believe it, and girlfriend, I would have blocked you too, you and Demming making him look like a fool the last few weeks, it was embarrassing for me to watch, How could you be so cruel Kate,"

"I don't know if I was as bad as you guys are making it out to be, I mean yeah, we kidded him, but**

"Bull shit Kate, Tom took it way too far over the line and you let him, why do you think Montgomery is so pissed, he heard half of what you and that Asshole were saying. He was waiting for you to stop it, to act like the lead detective you are, and to protect your partner, but that never came, so yeah, Roy is pissed, and he should be."

"Lanes, truthfully, did we, make that was I that bad to Castle? I mean I may have shown Tom off a few times, but I really just wanted to make him jealous, not chase him away."

"Kate, between you and Demming, you were worse, Tom could be partially excused since he was trying to be the knight in shinning armor to steal your heart, he took it to far, but you let him. Then you added your own little snide comments, and what was that shit about necking with Tom in the staircase? I saw it and you initiated it, did you think that would bring Castle running to you professing his love?"

"I fucked up didn't I Lanes, Big Time, then I broke up with Tom, well at least he won't be used any more if there is any positive to that, but God, I have to fix this. He's been angry at me before, but he's never blocked me from his landline, or sent me to voice mail repeatedly on his cell, I don't know how to fix this."

"Have you tried to talk to him, and I don't mean on the phone, especially after you had a few drinks, do you remember what you said at all Kate? I know you and when you are angry and drinking you are down right cruel, you better hope that wasn't the case with Rick, or you may have just kissed any chance with him goodbye."

"I don't remember everything, but I do remember calling him a spineless coward, and a Bastard, so God, it was bad, I just know it. Now what the hell do I do?"

"How the hell do you ever solve a case Kate Beckett, go to his home, beg forgiveness and forget your pride unless you're OK with him walking away, make a decision Girl."

 **Two Hours Later**

 **In a Cab in route to the Loft**

Kate had written everything she wanted to say down on note cards, and if she could just get Rick to see her for a few minutes she was positive that he would forgive her, he always did. She had taken the extra effort to put on his favorite blouse, one that showed just enough, and used the matching underwear, who knows how far this would go. As she pulled up to his loft, she dismissed the cab not knowing how long she would be with Rick.

She enters the Lobby of his building as she had hundreds of times before but this time, Eduardo does more than wave, he calls her by name.

"Detective Beckett, may we have a word please?"

"Sure Eduardo, it's nice to see you again, everything OK?"

"Well, Detective, I'm very sorry to tell you but Mr. Castle has removed your name from the secured guest list and placed it on the Do Not Allow list, I'm sorry but you will need to leave the building, and until Mr. Castle changes it, please do not return."

"Eduardo, you know me, it has to be a mistake, I mean Rick is pissed off at me, but he wouldn't do this, just call up and ask him."

"I wish I could Ms. Beckett, but he is away, for an unknown duration."

"Well call his cell, you know this is ridiculous, I came here to apologize now I am even more pissed at the pompous Son of a Bitch, who the hell does he think he is, he can't block me, I never wanted to work with the Asshole anyway."

"Please Detective, you are asked to leave, and lower your voice, profanity is not allowed in our lobby as you know so please do not make this even harder for my staff and I than it already is, I beg of you"

"I'm sorry Eduardo, you're right, I will be leaving, I apologize to your staff, and especially to you, I was always treated so nicely by you all and I know you must follow orders."

Kate steps out of the building, hails the first cab, cutting in front of others and yells, "Police Business" and makes her way home, if people could erupt like volcano's she would be on CNN soon as she fights to hold in her emotions till she reaches her apartment, then finally throws herself on her bed and lets the tears flow, he's gone for good this time.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Dropped Call

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 4**

 **Previously**

" _Kate, between you and Demming, you were worse, Tom could be partially excused since he was trying to be the knight in shining armor to steal your heart, he took it to far, but you let him. Then you added your own little snide comments, and what was that shit about necking with Tom in the staircase? I saw it and you initiated it, did you think that would bring Castle running to you professing his love?"_

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada**

 **One Hour After First Meeting at Hospital**

Trey hated to admit, but she was glad Rick had arranged the Car Service to pick them up, the waiting, anticipation, unknown and just plain fear had done a number on her energy. She was sure Rick wouldn't admit it, but he was just as concerned as she, about all the What If's that were totally out of their control.

It was easy to say, take what life gives you, when you were healthy, quite another thing when you were facing a potential death sentence through no fault of your own. She had the intuition of a woman who had felt rejection, and hurt, that Rick wasn't telling her the entire story.

That was fine, he barely knew her, she just hoped in time he would grow to trust her as she had already begun to trust him. It was very strange for her, she had always been so guarded with herself, yet this man just made her feel so comfortable, that no matter what happened, things would be OK. She was so comfortable with him in fact she just realized he had been asking her a question,

"Earth to Trey, anybody in there" he smiled as he waved a hand in front of her face and that big baritone voice, it sent chills down her spine, Stop That, later she thought

"I'm sorry Rick just lost in my thoughts, I didn't hear what you said,"

"I said that if you wanted dinner, we had better order room service before the kitchen closes or we pass midnight for treatment tomorrow, I mean unless you feel like going down to the restaurant, your call."

"Room service sounds good to me, I don't know about you but I'm exhausted, and I didn't drive all the way in from New York like you did."

"I'm OK Trey, a little tired, but I've been worse. I do owe you an apology for not coming clean with you right away about the Rogers vs Castle thing, I'm not a big celebrity but some how someone is always willing to pay for some private details of my life, and if the word got out that I was in a Cancer treatment program, it might tank sales,"

"You know Rick, it could go the other way too, it could boost them with everyone rooting for the nice guy hero,"

Rick laughs, now I know you're not a fan, no matter how hard I try, I keep the label of a playboy, and womanizer. True, a lot of stories my publicist and editor plant to keep my name out there and younger female audience buying the books, but I'm really tired of all that. I have a daughter, entering college soon, and really is that what she needs to read about her dad?

"I see what you mean, so I guess you have alias's you use when you want things kept on the Down Low, like this. Did you use Jameson Rook, this time, or use Richard Rogers?"

Rick looks like the cat that got caught in the canary cage, "I used Rogers for the hotel, but we used a new one for the study, one that hopefully can't be traced back to me or my work.

Rick Gates is what I'll be known at the hospital as, we looked at the NYPD roster that has never met me and there's a female in internal affairs named Victoria Gates, figured it was common enough that we could use it, What do you think?"

"Yeah, that should work, I'm glad you told me, since I would be looking for Rick, that good looking guy that's about 6 feet 1 inch tall, around 210 pounds beautiful blue eyes and hair that is never out of place," she blushes as she finishes her statement.

"Well you know Trey, I introduced you with two names, all I know you as Trey, the beautiful brunette, about 5 feet, 6 inches tall, body to die for, and the most beautiful eyes this side of heaven, you see you never gave me a last name, real or fake," he smiles a wide genuine smile one that he hasn't for a long time.

"I'm sorry, Rick, my last name for this study is Bolin, it was my ex-husbands name, but I've gone back to my maiden name of Tatianna Belmont for everything else. I even checked into this room using Belmont. I guess we both need to take notes for the hospital, or we'll have them so confused," she laughs.

"So, Trey is short for Tatianna, it's such a beautiful name, why use a nickname."

"The French pronounce it, or try to and it sounds like a disease, so Trey was easier, plus a smaller name tag to keep the dirty old men looking where they should" as she laughs again, such a beautiful laugh, almost like, no stop

"You have such a beautiful laugh Trey, you should do that more"

"You know come to think about it, I guess I haven't laughed in a long time, Thanks Rick,"

"Guess it's the funny kid on the school yard in me," he whispers but his eyes are full of sadness

"Rick, whoever hurt you by saying that was wrong, as she took his hand, you're one of the sweetest men I have ever met. Just keep making me laugh, and I'll try to do the same for you, Lord knows we are going to need humor to get through this."

Rick's eyes begin to sparkle again, "Hey like Laugh Buddies, when you get down, I'll make you laugh, and you do the same to me," as he fist bumps her.

Room Service arrives, and they take turns sampling each other's food as if they had been friends for years rather than hours. Both laugh and talk so freely, nothing sexual, just funny stories, and finally how they were diagnosed.

Trey's story almost made Rick cry, she was married to a man, unemployed so much that they were forced to use public assistance meaning she was low on the priority list for specialists, and unfortunately by the time they caught her medical condition, they had lost the baby.

Mr. Wonderful had filed for divorce before Trey had recuperated enough to be discharged from the hospital. Her mother was in Hospice at the time and her younger brother was running back and forth trying to take care of them both, till the mother died.

The only positive thing to come of that was, she had left the childhood home to both siblings in equal shares, and also the diner, which had been managed by a friend of the family for years. She had been home two months when the hospital called with her lab results showing a positive test for cervical cancer, and through a social worker she had gotten into this program.

"And the rest Rick is history or will be when we complete this program. What about you? I mean if you want to share, I don't want to be nosy."

"No, I'm sorry, I am just trying to wrap my head around the callousness of your ex-husband, that not only was cruel but had to be at the worst time of your life, I apologize for all my gender for such scum of the earth as he, and perhaps I shouldn't have said that*"

"No Rick, it's OK, I've called him worse, I'm touched that the story impacted you so deeply, you really are a caring human being," once again she sits next to him and takes his big hand in her small petite hands,

"Hey We'll get through this, and you know what, I'm so happy you came into the diner today so we could meet, I didn't know if I could make it through this, but now, well with your help we both will," she leans in to kiss him on the cheek, he turns slightly and they just brush lips, she doesn't pull back so Rick kisses her again, gently and sweetly.

"I'm so sorry Trey, that was out of line, and totally not what I promised you, forgive me please?"

"No" she says,

"No?" he repeats?

"No, I won't apologize for something I've wanted to do since I saw you." This time it's Trey who takes the imitative, and kisses Rick like he had longed to be kissed for a long time.

"Trey I don't want you to do this because you feel sorry for me, or you thin*"

"Shut up Rick and Kiss me, we can't do anything past 2nd base but believe me, it's been a long time since I have wanted to kiss anyone as much as I do you, and sympathy has nothing to do with it, you may not know it but You're a Stud" she laughs then kisses him again.

Suddenly the holding and comforting allows Rick an opportunity to let the story out, the entire story including how afraid he was, and how he had to say goodbye to Alexis knowing it could be the last time like it was.

He hadn't noticed but the more he talked the more his tears flowed, Trey held him, comforting him with small sweet kisses to the temple and just whispering in his ear that things would be OK, God he had needed this so badly.

Finally, he looks up into the most beautiful pair of green eyes he had ever seen, she kissed him sweetly, then asked,

"Feel any better Rick? I'll be here for you whenever you need me for as long as you need me, OK?" then kisses him sweetly.

Thanks Trey, well so much for the big strong arms comforting you, I'm sorry I was such a weak*"

"You finish that word Rick Castle and I'll kick your ass, I mean it, you're no weakling, you have given me the strength to fight this, hopefully I can give you some as well."

"Trey, Thank You, I think we better set the alarm, what time would you like to get up, I know there's two showers so that's no issue, the car will be here at 6:45 AM, so what time should I set?

"That depends, are you going to sleep with me or by yourself Rick?"

"What do you want Trey? I can tell you right now, unless you want me to go to my room, I would love to stay"

"Right answer, Rick, how about we get up at 4:45AM, I'm not sure what they mean by light meal, but I'm guessing it's fruit, toast, and that nature,"

"I'll miss my coffee" they both say in unison, then break out laughing,

"Hey, we better get some sleep, OK, so Good Night Trey, Thank You," as he kisses her gently to have her deepen it and add tongue, a lot of tongue.

"Good night Rick, right here if you need me, OK?"

"OK, Thanks Beautiful"

 **Beckett's Apartment**

 **2:00 PM Same Day**

Kate had hit rock bottom, been almost physically tossed from the building where Rick lived, no way to contact him, or wait was there. Swallowing a great deal of pride, and making up a story, she looks up the contact information and slowly dials the phone.

"Gina Cowell's Office, Amy speaking how may I help you?"

"Amy this is Detective Kate Beckett, NYPD, it's important I speak to Gina Cowell please,

"May I ask what this is concerning?"

"No, you can't what part of NYPD don't you understand?"

"One moment please"

"Hi Kate, this is Gina, I'll save you some time, I have no fucking clue where Rick went, the only way we can contact him is through Paula. She has some secure line, or something and texts him a few times a day.

I think he synched his Voice Mail to his cloud account so if you sent him a voice mail, he got it, and is just being Rick and not answering. Anything else you need? If you need to reach Rick, Call Paula, that's what I have to do on every issue that comes up.

I don't know what happened, but he has really withdrawn this time, almost like he doesn't want any contact with somebody. Nothing happened between you two did it?"

"No, of course not," Kate lies. "I was just stuck on a case and wanted his input."

"Well if you hear from him, let us know, the board wants to cut a new contract for more books, but he holds control of all creative processes."

"Will do, and Thanks"

Kate thinks to herself, shit she has really done it this time, he did get his voice mail the one she can't remember how bad it was, only that it was bad.

Well she's gone this far, might as well go all the way,

"Paula Haas speaking, how can I help you Detective Beckett?"

"I've been trying to get in touch with Rick for a few days and he hasn't answered my voice mails and*

"And you've been blocked from his building, his land line, and you're wondering if I can do you a favor? Why, Why, would I want to help the one is has broken his heart into a million pieces, and been so stupid she didn't even notice? Oh, that was a lovely voice mail you sent the other night or early AM. You see Ricky backs up everything to the cloud and has me screen them when he is, well OUT, and when I heard yours, I thought What the Hell did he ever do to you, except help you, and this is how you treat him."

"Paula, I had too much to drink, and I don't even remember what I said, I know I was angry because he skipped out on the going away party that Espo and Kevin worked so hard on, had something better to do."

"Beckett, that was me, he was stuck in traffic on the LIE coming back from dropping off Alexis at Princeton, the accident that killed three, the truck jackknifed and 6 hour delay, you're a fucking cop and you didn't bother to check if Rick was involved in the accident, or just stuck in traffic, especially you, you knew where he was going and the route to get there, some friends.

I texted Espo and Ryan along with Rick's apology he texted me, and also tickets to the Knicks next home game. He called 5 times, I got one word with each call then a Dropped Call, when LT asked me if he had something more important, I said apparently, never knowing how it would impact your little party."

"Paula I know I don't deserve this but I have to talk to Rick, please give me a number to reach him, I mean I have to talk to him, I broke up with the Demming, and Rick has to know why!"

"Why indeed Detective, why the hell do you think he is off grid, even Alexis can't reach him and if you think I'm going to give you his contact information because you broke up with Mr. Hot Pants and now suddenly Rick is who you want, you are out of your FUCKING Mind.

You have CI's, key meaning Confidential, would you give one of them up Detective? Nah, didn't think so, let me put this as clearly as I can, I love my Boss, even though I know he will never reciprocate, it doesn't matter.

Richard Castle is one of the most gentle, sincere, loyal, kind, and genuine people in this world, the page six stories are fabricated by Gina, and some by me, but that's what they are Fake, just like you Detective, the only time Rick is useful to you, is when you need something. You want to know what you said on your Voice Mail, here I'll play it, "

The next several minutes, Kate can't believe the vile hate filled language, the obscenities she never even knew she had spoken, calling Rick spineless, pompous, and one who never gave a shit about those who went out their way to plan a party, then she said, you spoiled my surprise as well, then more obscenities, till finally it clicked off, exceeding the limit of the Voice Mail.

"Do you think for one minute I would give you anything to do with Rick after listening to that? If you loved him like I do, would you? Well that's a stupid question since the only person you can love is yourself. Just for your information, I forwarded a copy of that voice mail to Ryan and Esposito, along with Ms. Parrish, so you can't play the victim this time, I'll let Rick know you called and share your concerns, Good day Detective" as the line goes dead,

Once again Kate hangs her head, more in shame and guilt for her actions, she can't blame Demming for this, this she owned, now she had to figure out what she could do about it, and that wasn't going to be easy.

TBC

 **Note to Guest/Anon or non-email reviewers** If you don't see your review it was because it was deleted, I don't debate medical facts, your medical opinions, sarcastic remarks, perception why I did or didn't do something, bashing of any character or me, any demeaning or rude comments are trashed, if you want a discussion log in, if not go somewhere else. This story brought a great deal of new Guests out, if you don't like what or how I write move along, if you post a review that is not constructive or is vindictive, you've wasted time you will never get back, I monitor all reviews, Especially those from sources I cannot reply to and those are usually the first to be deleted. To the one that said "Don't write about cancer if you don't know anything about it" it proves how uninformed you are, read earlier Love's Journey and you will see I am an active volunteer member of a Cancer hospital.


	5. Chapter 5

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 5**

 **Previously**

You want to know what you said on your Voice Mail, here I'll play it, "

The next several minutes, Kate can't believe the vile hate filled language, the obscenities she never even knew she had spoken, calling Rick spineless, pompous, and one who never gave a shit about those who went out their way to plan a party, then she said, you spoiled my surprise as well, then more obscenities, till finally it clicked off, exceeding the limit of the Voice Mail.

"Do you think for one minute I would give you anything to do with Rick after listening to that? If you loved him like I do, would you? Well that's a stupid question since the only person you can love is yourself. Just for your information, I forwarded a copy of that voice mail to Ryan and Esposito, along with Ms. Parrish, so you can't play the victim this time, I'll let Rick know you called and share your concerns, Good day Detective" as the line goes dead,

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada 6:30 AM Next Day**

Trey and Rick had tried to sleep, but even as exhausted as they both were, the best they could come up with was some very romantic cuddling, with her head on his chest, and his strong arm around her to make her feel safe, and she had. For the first time in as long as she could remember, she felt safe in Rick's arms.

They had turned the alarm off, showered separately, Rick's idea not Treys, since Rick said he just didn't have the will power to keep his hands where they needed to be, especially heading to the hospital for day one of treatment. Each had a yogurt and fruit cup and now waited for the car to buzz Rick to begin the first day of perhaps the rest of their lives,

"Trey, before we leave, I mean, I just want, well I want to Thank You for last night. I have been alone so long, you have no idea how good it felt to let some of that go, sorry to burden you with it, I mean your plate is as full if not more so than mine,"

Trey stands on her tiptoes, to kiss Rick, sweet and slowly,

"As much as you needed to unload your troubles, I needed to be needed, not just to pay the bills but to share something so intimate as we shared without any sex, no one would understand unless they had gone through this, so Thank You for trusting me Rick, I knew it was hard for you. I'm here and will be till the end."

Rick's phone buzzes alerting him the car service was downstairs,

"Well, what do you say Beautiful, let's go kick Cancer's Ass day 1" as he holds his arm out to her.

"Yeah, Let's do it Stud,

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **7:10 AM Same Day**

Rick and Trey entered the Hospital right on time and proceeded to the desk to be assigned their routines for Day 1, surprisingly they were in the same break out session, which kicked the treatment off. A quick overview of the day's activities, some reading materials for each to read while in the infusion chairs receiving the cocktails as the Doctors called the solution being introduced to each patient through an IV Line.

Both Rick and Trey had opted to have a Peripherally Inserted Central Catheter (PICC) line inserted slightly below the skin so it was painless to insert the IV. The schedule would be 2 hours in the chair receiving the infusion cocktail, 30-minute break, another 2 hours of infusion, followed by one-hour lunch, then finally 90 minutes of infusion. This would be the routine for each day except Friday, when they would be reduced to a half day, then allow patients off for the weekend.

This schedule worked much better for the patients than the original one that Gregg had warned Rick about and was a pleasant surprise to both Trey and Rick. That meant that outside of some much-needed rest they would have an opportunity to see some of the sights together, and Toronto was truly a beautiful city. This news raised the spirts of all in their group.

They were also cautioned that the programs were designed for each individual, and they shouldn't be upset if some infusions were shorter, it was all based on the base cancer cells they were targeting. As an additional surprise Rick and Trey were in joint infusion chairs, which resembled oversized first-class airline seats. They had each other to lean on throughout the entire program, there was a God, Trey thought as she learned the good news.

The infusion solution alternated from freezing to almost feeling like boiling water, which the Doctors were pleased with, meaning it was working. After fighting the exhaustion for about an hour Trey leaned her head of Rick's shoulder and was out in an instant. Rick called the nurse over to insure she was covered with the blankets, and leaned his head against her, and they both were out.

Thankfully most of the day, alternating breaks, then more treatment, then lunch then finally the last 90 minutes and then they were finished for day one. Rick looked at Trey who was still exhausted, and asked her quietly,

"Want to just stay in for room service tonight, we don't have to be back till 9:00 AM tomorrow so we can get some sleep, unless you need to do anything else?"

"Rick thank you, Room Service sounds perfect, I think the whole thing is catching up with us both, I would just like to hold you for a while, when we get home if that's OK?"

"That's perfect Trey, and I love when you cuddle with me, I don't need anything else, just your arms around me and I'm at peace."

"That's sweet Rick, but you're a man and you have needs, so if you want someone els*"

She doesn't get to finish what she is going to say as Rick smothers her lips pouring his love, thanks and understanding into the kiss.

"OK Buster let me rest a little bit, and remember you started this" and that beautiful laugh comes out of her frail body.

Although Monday was Memorial Day in the USA, it was just another work day in Toronto, and as they watched the local news, and lay on the bed, Rick watched the coverage of the US News on BBC.

"Are you sorry you are here Rick?" and as he looks those beautiful green eyes were looking straight into his,

"Not for one second Trey, it just brought back some memories, sorry to let it show so easy."

"Hey Rick, we talked about this, remember, you have to let me in, Please. I know it's tough and I'm not asking to know everything that ever happened in your life, but when you make that face, yeah, that one that shows pain, then I want to know so I can maybe take the pain away. Does that make sense?"

"I'm sorry Trey, yeah you're right, what do you want to know, or I should say how much of the saga do you want to hear, I can tell you some isn't nice."

"How about you tell me, and if I think it's too much for me, I'll tell you and we move to the next chapter, deal?"

"Deal"

"Rick, remember you heard about my divorce, miscarriage, Death of my Mom, and cancer diagnosis before we shared dinner, so what do you think that something will scare me away? I'm here, and unless you tell me to go make poutine at the diner, I'm not leaving" as she leans in and kisses him sweetly.

A smile breaks across Rick's face as he pulls her into him, arm wrapped around her careful not to squeeze to hard on today's infusion site, Well here goes.

For the next hour and forty minutes Rick explains the dynamics of his and Detective Beckett's working arrangement, and some of the events that had occurred recently. To his credit, he included those that made him look less than delightful as well, including Ellie Monroe, and Natalie Rhodes, even though nothing happened other than the kiss on the elevator.

The hardest part was describing how she had chosen a Robbery Detective over him, not just that he had lost out on her companionship, but she seemed to change, to become hateful and cruel. He described the last three weeks at the 12th precinct, and as he spoke, Trey, clinched her fists into the covers on the bed. Things that had been building a friendship or more between them hadn't been damaged but bombed out of existence.

He progressed to the point where he had invited her to his Hamptons house for a friendly get away, and she had lied, then the Robbery Cop came up last minute and she had decided to go away with him, in fact they were probably just getting back to NYC now, since tomorrow was Tuesday and the end of a three day weekend in the states.

He mentioned that there had been a big accident on the LIE and three people had been killed, causing a huge traffic jam that prevented him from returning to the party the detectives had planned for his going away. He explained that he had his Publicist text an apology explaining the entire situation to the boys and send them floor seat tickets to the Knicks game, so they were good. He paused,

"Somehow I know that's not the end of the story is it Rick?"

"No, No, it's not Trey. About three weeks earlier, my best friend and Oncologist had found the cancer, but I had to go back and pretend everything was fine, I mean I had the book sales and my Daughter and Mother to worry about, so no sense raising concern till there is a real reason to.

It was about this time that the Robbery Cop came into our lives, and dealing with hiding my cancer, and a sudden change, well betrayal really put me at about the end of my rope. I had to drop Alexis off, and God she would have cancelled a once a lifetime opportunity if she knew, I didn't want that"

"So, you drove her to Princeton, acting like the Dad she had always known, hiding your fear, and concern from everyone? Pretty much sum it up about how and why your feelings were so deeply hidden our first night?"

"Yeah but being totally honest with you, letting you in, you sure you want to go this far Trey, I mean I under*"

Trey's lips are on his and kissing gently reassuring kisses trying to wash away all of the hurt, pain and disappointment of the last several weeks.

"That answer your question?"

"Yeah, and God you are so beautiful, but this next part is really ugly, I mean it shocked me."

"Rick, let me in Sweetie you've come this far,"

"OK, here goes, I don't even know what provoked this, apparently Beckett got really upset that I didn't show up for the party, but hell she's a cop, they had to know about the huge traffic jam, but any way, I got a voice mail from her in the middle of the night.

I had already left for Toronto and was only carrying a phone that only one person can reach me on, but my regular account is synched to my cloud account, so it captured her voice mail, if you can call it that."

"Can you play if for me Rick or is it too personal?"

"It's not too personal, but it's rough, I mean really rough, you sure you want to hear it?"

A simple glare of her eyes, and a squeeze of his hand is the answer that Rick needs. He accesses his cloud account and opens a red flagged message in a folder marked VM_Regular. He takes a deep sigh, and presses the play key, and out comes Kate's voice with words, he had never heard her utter before, and in such a tone that spewed hatred and contempt, worse than she had ever spoken to any suspect they had interviewed together.

Trey is silently fisting the covers and looking for something to smash, she's angry, hurt and feeling pure hatred for one Kate Beckett, NYPD.

Finally, after about 5 minutes of silence her voice asks in a very shaky tone,  
"Rick, can I invite Kate to Toronto for dinner?"

"Do you really want to do that Trey, and if so why?

"Yes I really do, and why, I want to throw her ass off the top of the CN Tower, then I want to pick her up and do it again, Oh Rick, I'm sorry no one deserved that, " as tears fall from her eyes.

"That was the voice mail you were listening to, when the ladies session went long, and I walked up on you, isn't it?"

Rick hung his head and just nodded.

"Oh Rick, you have to talk to me, Hun, I won't let anyone ever talk to you like that again, I don't care if she's a cop or not, If I ever see her I owe her a Canadian Ass Kicking."

"Trey, we have the rest of the night, can we just talk about something pleasant, or watch a movie, Hell even a chick flick would be better than dealing with that stuff" as he kisses her on the cheek.

"I'm sorry Rick, guess I'm the protective type, and that hurt me, no one should hurt anyone like that, especially someone you thought was a friend. You're right, we've got better things to do with our time tonight. Know what I want to do?"

"Eh No but I know it's going to be fun."

"We have the weekend off this weekend, so let's go to the Toronto Zoo, I haven't been since I was a kid, do you want to?"

A big smile flashes across Rick's face, as he replies, "Of course, I have never been to this one. That's a great idea Sweetie."

They lay together beginning to feel the exhaustion overtake them both, so they dress for bed, and once again, assume their position, her head on his chest, his arm draped across pulling her into him. One kiss goodnight and both were out for the night.

A/N We'll pick up Beckett's return to the precinct on Tuesday in the next chapter, I didn't want to split it up. Thanks for your reads, reviews, favors and follows. In response to the guest about moving too fast, Rick at this point has seen the woman he loves prepare to go away with someone she had rubbed his nose in about inadequacies, got a Cancer diagnosis, and met a hot woman, if you're a guy, things would have moved as fast if not faster. One reviewer spelled it out " **NOTHING to do with 'a woman having a sex life'. Go for it. They're not an item. Have dates. Have one-night stands. Have a boyfriend. Whatever. It's about her blatantly insulting the 'man she really loves'... someone who has already been abandoned by his first love and betrayed by one SPOUSE... someone who has always covered his vulnerability with humor and bravado (which she would KNOW if she bothered to actually listen and was really such a 'great detective')... on multiple levels and expecting him to NOT resent her for it.**


	6. Chapter 6

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 6**

 **Previously**

Trey is silently fisting the covers and looking for something to smash, she's angry, hurt and feeling pure hatred for one Kate Beckett, NYPD.

Finally, after about 5 minutes of silence her voice asks in a very shaky tone,  
"Rick, can I invite Kate to Toronto for dinner?"

"Do you really want to do that Trey, and if so why?

"Yes I really do, and why, I want to throw her ass off the top of the CN Tower, then I want to pick her up and do it again, Oh Rick, I'm sorry no one deserved that, " as tears fall from her eyes.

 **Tuesday After Memorial Day**

 **NYPD 12** **th** **Precinct 6:00 AM**

Kate had spent the remainder of her holiday weekend, trying to think of how things had gone so far wrong. One minute she was enjoying flirting with the new good-looking Detective, the next she had been ostracized from Rick's life all together. Paula held the key to any contact with him, which meant that she wasn't going to be able to contact him anytime soon.

Now that she had broken up with Tom, she was back to her usual Single status. Dating Tom was a mistake, she knew that then, and she knew it even more now, but Rick was supposed to get jealous, not step out of the way and give him an open lane, which wasn't her plan.

Castle never did what he was supposed to do, why the hell did he pick now to be the gentleman, why didn't he put up a fight for her? She had just about convinced herself that this whole mess was Rick's fault for not fighting for her when she hears a noise coming from the elevator. Habit forces her to look quickly towards there, in hopes it would be her writer, but not today, it was the maintenance man changing the bulb that had been burned out for weeks.

She is startled when she hears, "Beckett, I want to see you in my office, now" booming from the direction of Roy Montgomery's office. How did he get in without her hearing? Get a grip, Kate, you never needed him anyway, let it go she thinks to herself as she forces one last mental picture of Castle from her mind.

"Sir you wanted to see me" she says as she enters Roy's office knowing this isn't going to be pleasant.

"Beckett, you mind telling me what the hell is going on with your department?"

"Sir, I'm not sure what you mean, we've been off for the holiday so what is it that happened that you need clarification on Sir?

"Well for starters, I get a call from Captain Sipos on Friday afternoon right after the party that Demming would not be back to help on any further cases, and to refer all questions to you."

"Sir, as you are aware there was a personal relationship between Tom, I mean Detective Demming and myself, but I severed that last Friday before coming into the party. I'm not sure why he can't separate work from pleasure, going forward Sir."

"So, you used him to parade around in front of Castle to do what Beckett? Make the man jealous? What kind of High School logic is that? Never mind don't even answer that," Roy is fuming, and Kate doesn't understand what has made him so angry.

"So, did you enjoy your Holiday, Detective? Because I can think of better ways to spend my day off than answering questions from Mr. Mayor about why Rick Castle has submitted his resignation effective last Friday, especially when I didn't even know he was leaving. Care to shed some light on that subject Detective?"

"Sir, I only knew that Castle was going to the Hamptons as he typically does each Memorial Day, I had no knowledge of his resignation, I fully expected him to return today based on our last conversation here Sir" a very shaken Kate Beckett is able to squeak out.

"Quite a different story than Mr. Mayor relayed to me, I knew that you and Demming had really popped it to him, but to make him feel like he had nothing to contribute, and he wasn't a real cop, so he should just leave it to you, and go write his Nancy Drew books?

That by the way was what I personally heard, the Mayor would not go into details he just said the Rick felt it best for all parties to break clean and complete."

"Sir, this could be all my fault, I knew when he left last Friday he had planned to come back for the party, surprise is not Espo's forte, but when he said he had something better to do, that was a series of mistakes and breakdown in communication.

I found out later through his publicist that he was stuck in traffic on the LIE where they had the trailer jackknife and 3 people die in the accident, I should have know he wouldn't just blow off a promise like that. In fact, Paula his publicist has texted Ryan and Espo Rick's apology and he provided floor seats to an upcoming game."

"Why would his publicist do that Kate, why wouldn't Rick? Have you talked to him since then?"

"I tried Sir, but apparently between the beer and the vodka I had at home I did not portray myself with the message I wanted to, Paula retrieved it from the cloud and refuses to give me Rick's contact information."

"Kate, don't tell me you went off on one of your rants using every cuss word a cop has ever heard, did you?"

"Sir, I didn't know it till Monday when I got in touch with Paula and she played it back, it was awful sir, and I'm so embarrassed, on so many fronts"

"Well the worst-case scenario has been confirmed, I don't think we could get Rick back here if my life depended on it. It's too bad you had to let your perception take over and not even give the man who had been by your side for two years the benefit of the doubt.

What makes it worse is you used another man to try to achieve whatever the hell you were trying to achieve, it was Stupid, and unprofessional, now get out of my sight Detective, Dismissed"

"But Sir I*"

"I said **DISMISSED** Detective, close the door on your way out"

Kate was rattled, Roy had never talked to her that way, not even when he forced her to go to therapy. She slipped out of his office to see Espo and Ryan sitting at their desks, trying to act nonchalant, she asked

"Hey guys, how was your weekend?"

This would usually generate some discussion about basketball, football or whatever sport was in season it didn't matter they never agreed on any teams. This morning was different, very different, both responded in unison,

"Fine" and nothing else.

"Aren't you going to ask me how mine was guys?"

Once again in unison, "Nope"

Kate got pissed all over again, how dare Castle fuck with her even with he wasn't there, now he had turned her Captain and her team against her. She didn't know why, well she knew but she didn't want to accept the fact that she had cost the entire Precinct a very good, loyal and well-connected friend. One who more than once had helped out a lot more people than just her.

"OK you two, Conference room NOW!" she barks.

As they file into the conference room, first Ryan, then Espo, Kate notices that there is no longer the look of apprehension on Kevin's face as is normally the case.

"OK I know what's going on and what I want to know is how the hell do you think what happened between Castle and me is any of your business?" Kate spits out angrily

"Because you just cost us one of the best friend this department has ever know, and you used another Cop to further your agenda Beckett, if one of us had done that, we would be parking cars at the Port." Ryan speaks up with anger in his face and voice

"Something to add Esposito," Kate asks

" Nope, it wouldn't do any good anyway, you'll still blame any and everyone but you for what happened," he replied with distain.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Just what I said, your voice mail was over Rick missing a party that **we** had setup, because **YOU** had paraded another man, a cop, in front of him till he couldn't take it and took the gentleman's way out, leaving you to your new toy.

BUT wait a minute, you didn't want Tom, who by the way isn't a bad guy, he just made the mistake of getting tangled up with you and got played. No guy wants that Beckett anymore than you do, how would you have felt.

Then you go off on Castle about missing the party, and you knew he was in route back from Princeton, you heard the calls for shutting down the LIE, and it never occurred to you that Rick could have been injured, or if not was in one hell of a traffic jam?

You had the facts of where he was, he apologized in a text to Ryan and me, but God Damn it Kate you knew all along the route he had to take. Don't you have any heart at all? To not even have enough concern about one of our own, and yes, he wasn't a cop, but he was a hell of a lot better than a lot we've seen, AND he cared, about us, and especially about YOU. Looks like Tom wasn't the only guy that got played,"

Kate is shaking by the time Espo is finished, instead of disputing him she heads for the door, and hears one final shot,

"If you're looking for Lanie, she wanted to relay a message to you, She's Busy, don't call her unless work related."

Kate rushes out of the room and into the bathroom, crying and losing the little bit of the morning bagel she had gotten down, talk about fucking up, this was he Gold Medal moment for that. How could she fix this? God only knows but one thing is for certain things would never be like the used to be.

TBC

Before anyone says I'm rough on Kate, remember what she has done in THIS story, not canon, and to play one cop to get attention then blast a friend like she did, well enough said,


	7. Chapter 7

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 7**

 **Previously**

" _Well the worst-case scenario has been confirmed, I don't think we could get Rick back here if my life depended on it. It's too bad you had to let your perception take over and not even give the man who had been by your side for two years the benefit of the doubt._

 _What makes it worse is you used another man to try to achieve whatever the hell you were trying to achieve, it was Stupid, and unprofessional, now get out of my sight Detective, Dismissed"_

" _But Sir I*"_

" _I said_ _ **DISMISSED**_ _Detective, close the door on your way out"_

 **12** **th** **Precinct**

 **Later the Same Morning**

Kate had regained some of her composure and was determined to show them, show them all she didn't need Castle, or any of them. Did she screw up? Yes, and she admitted that, but it wasn't her fault Castle finally got the message and quit, why did Roy and the boys act like it was such a big deal?

They had done nicely before he weaseled his way into their lives, it was just a coincidence that the closure rate went up each month he worked with them. Oh, hell who was she trying to convince, she didn't believe it herself.

She stepped outside and made a call she dreaded and got prepared to hear it all over again.

"Kate, what do you want now? I thought I was clear about Rick's intentions when we last spoke, you're not getting his contact information," the nasal tone of Rick's publicist Paula Haas had never infuriated Kate more than they did at this minute.

"Paula did you know that Rick resigned last Friday. I guess he informed the Mayor by call last week.?"

"What if I did Kate, what difference would it make?"

"Maybe none to you or him but the Captain, Mayor and my team think Rick resigned because of me, particularly the Voice Mail you so kindly forwarded to them."

"I never sent the Captain or the Mayor your voice mail, would have been a nice touch, but Ricky, no matter how pissed he is at you would have my head if I went that far. The poor sucker still cares about you after all you put him through."

"Well, can you ask Rick to call me, please, if he doesn't want to talk to me at least call the Captain to tell him why he left, I mean that was before I called. Look I did a lot of rotten crap, but this is something I didn't do. I used Tom to try to get Rick, another thing I have to live with, but God Damn it why won't he just give me 5 minutes that all I ask. Can you ask him Paula, Please?"

"Kate, I will ask him in a text, but I doubt he will even respond when he see's your name, and I really don't know what to tell you."

"Paula, I'll go camp out outside the house in the Hampton's he has come out sooner or later,"

"Kate, he's not in the Hampton's, no one knows where he is, not even Alexis and I swear if you call her, I will personally come over and stick one of those 6 inch heels up your ass, you got that?"

"What do you mean he's not in the Hampton's you have to know where he is you have his cell phone to call him"

"After working with you for a few years, and the CIA before that do you really think he is going to leave the tracking feature on the phone? In fact, he has changed them twice already, sent me the new phones totally different models, and numbers, whatever spooked him did a hell of a job on him. He's gone off grid before but never like this, ever. It's almost like he wants to disappear from something or somebody completely."

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada 6:30 AM Tuesday Same Day**

"Hey Sleepy head wake up, Try gently nudges Rick, we have some time for breakfast before we have to leave."

"That's not the way you are supposed to wake me, and you know it" muffles a sleepy Rick Castle,

Trey takes his face cups it gently in her hands and kisses him as she looks him deep into his eyes, Green versus Blue, God she was beautiful.

"One more for the road please" Rick whines and Trey smacks him on the arm then kisses him deeper, and longer.

"Thank you Rick, I know I would be going crazy if I were going through this alone, but no matter what happens, I'll be OK, I know and I have you to thank for that."

"Race you to the showers," he says and she laughs, "Use your own mine is all setup with my shampoos and conditioners" she knows he will do anything to make her laugh, it seems like she has laughed more since she was diagnosed with Cancer and met Rick than she has in a very long time.

Rick is just about to stir and go take his shower when his phone beeps with an incoming text from Paula, it simply says,

"All hell breaking lose at the Precinct, Mayor involved, Beckett begging to talk to you, call me when you can"

Rick has not and did not plan to hide anything from Trey, so he shows her the text,

"Sweetie, who is Paula, I know who Kate is, but who is this?"

"She's my publicist who would die before she gave up any secrets, so I can trust her with anything, except, no one but you and Gregg know about my cancer and I want it to stay that way, OK?"

"Of course, Sweetie"

"Do you mind listening in, I mean I don't want to upset you before treatment."

She just glares at him through those pools of Green,

"OK, I'll call and see what's going on, stay with me please?

"Sure Rick, I'm not going anywhere"

Rick dials Paula's number on speaker, and hears,

"Ricky, Sweetie how are you, and why do you have me on speaker?"

"Hi Paula, I'm fine, and I'm meeting with some Russian mobsters, so I thought I would get your input, you said things are gong to Hell, what's going on? Before you say anything, I have Trey Boland here with me, so speak as free as you please but know that there is a lady in the room so watch your potty mouth"

"Well I guess Captain Montgomery raised all kinds of Hell with Beckett once he found out you had resigned, from the Mayor, no less on Monday his day off, and then the Boy Toy's Captain called up on Friday and informed Roy that he would not work with Kate anymore, guess she dumped him right before the party they were going to have for you, and it didn't take a genius to figure out he had been played trying to make you jealous."

"Pause it there Paula, first, there was a letter of resignation on Kate's desk and in the middle top drawer of Roy's, what she did afterward was really surprising to me, but it had no bearing on me leaving. I even told Roy I have some personal commitment to take care of but hope to rejoin him in the future if all works out."

"Well I guess Roy was so pissed at her about using Demming the way she did, he didn't let any of that out, but she has called me 5 times begging for your contact information, she said she was drunk and didn't mean anything she said."

Trey speaks up now, "Well Paula this is Trey, I heard it, and in my experience there is more truth to people who talk when they are drunk than sober, they don't have the fear of hurting anyone's feelings, and she sure as hell didn't."

"Hey Ricky, if she's as beautiful as she is smart you may want to think about keeping her, at le*"

"Paula, you are my publicist, if I want unsolicited advice, I'll ask my mother, so keep your thoughts to yourself."

"I'm sorry Ricky, I was just trying to lighten this load of crap I have to dump on you, what do you want me to do about Beckett?"

"Nothing"

"Nothing Ricky, should I tell her anything, or just tell her nothing?

"Eduardo told me on a voice mail on the home phone she caused a scene at the Building, and she didn't respond well to being blocked on my land line, so just tell her I got her voice mail, and I'm working on a proper response, sorry to have been such a burden on them all."

"She knows you got it, guess she called Gina first before finally calling me, but Gina didn't cut her any slack either, well she doesn't know anything."

"OK anything else Paula, "

"Well can I ask you a question Rick?"

"You can ask, you may not get an answer"

"OK, are you in the Country, Ricky,"

"Paula I'm in A country I gotta go, talk to you in a few days, TEXT not call for crap like this please, Kate's broken heart is not a major concern for me at this point, I have higher priorities. "as the line goes dead

"Well Trey, sorry for you to hear all that, let's get ready to go kick Cancer's Ass, Day Two?

He turns, and she just falls into his arms and kisses him like there is no tomorrow, "I don't know why, but I'm glad you're with me, not them, Lets Kick Cancer's Ass Day Two!"

 **12** **th** **Precinct**

 **Later the Same Morning**

Kate's phone chirps with a tone for unidentified caller as she answers "Beckett"

"Well I spoke to Rick, I asked him to call you and his answer was and I quote "tell her I got her voice mail, and I'm working on a proper response, sorry to have been such a burden on them all."

"Is that all he said Paula?"

"Yeah, but I will tell you this, you pissed off another female there with him, wherever he is, she sounded like she wanted to kill you, I don't know who it was, friend, relative, or bimbo, but you're lucky she isn't close to you,"

"Yeah Paula, I'm lucky, so fucking lucky

Thanks for trying"

"Yeah, one more thing look around your desk, Rick put a letter of resignation on your desk and in the top middle drawer of Roy's before he left Friday, not much but it will at least show he had already had enough before you pulled your Award Winning performance."

"Hang on a second, God Damn him, I told him a million times to stay out of my desk drawers,"

"Well I take it you found the letter Kate, use it wisely because I don't think you'll be hearing from Rick for a good while,"

"Thanks Paula, I do appreciate your help, if anything changes please call me day or night,"

"I will Detective, but like I said, don't hold your breath, later Detective" and click as the phone goes dead.

Kate is almost afraid to open the letter, but if she was going to tell Roy, she needed to know what was in it. Slowly she opened the envelope and began to read,

 _To: Captain Roy Montgomery, Detectives Beckett, Esposito, Ryan and all of the members of the 12_ _th_ _precinct. ME Lanie Parrish_

 _I want to express my deepest gratitude to each of you for any kindness you may have shown me during my tenure as the Civilian Consultant, assigned to your precinct. I know at first and to some yet today, my presence was not welcomed, and for that I deeply apologize, but also wanted to thank everyone. I have learned something from everyone I have had dealings with, even if in some cases it's how NOT to handle a situation. I learned the meaning of brotherhood, and also what is was like to put yourself on the line for someone else, even if the other didn't know or care._

 _I have personal issues in my life that will make it impossible for me to continue in this role, which should provide a great deal of relief to some if not many. I have enjoyed my time, and I leave a better man than I came. I am truly sorry for those for whom my presence offended, it was never my intention. I leave you now to return to the "normal" police business conducted by "real cops"._

 _Since I am leaving the precinct many will think I can devote more time to writing, Sorry to inform you I am also taking a hiatus from writing, and although not dead the Nikki Heat series is officially on hold, a very expensive gesture on my part. I can't write something I don't have passion for, and sadly recent events, personal, professional, and at the precinct have made this decision my only option._

 _Please enjoy the gift cards that will be delivered to each member next week, and accept them as a token of my gratitude and appreciation, I'm sorry I couldn't get them to you personally,_

 _Respectfully,_

 _Richard Castle_

Kate hangs her head, not that she would expect him to continue to write the Heat series, but my God, he had stopped writing anything. The world needed his talent, young women like herself needed to know that justice does prevail, and now they won't because she had broken his spirit. She keyed in on certain phrases such as Real Cop, Normal Police Business, and a sense of being unwelcome, ALL of these were on her, and her alone. What the Hell had she done,

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 8**

 **Previously**

"Pause it there Paula, first, there was a letter of resignation on Kate's desk and in the middle top drawer of Roy's, what she did afterward was really surprising to me, but it had no bearing on me leaving. I even told Roy I have some personal commitment to take care of but hope to rejoin him in the future if all works out."

 **NYPD 12** **th** **Precinct**

 **1:00 PM Same Day**

Captain Montgomery had finally made it back from his meetings at 1PP and unlike most days, where no one would dare approach him, at least for a few hours Kate boldly stepped forward and knocked on his door.

"Sir, can I see you for a few minutes, this concerns Castle, Sir"

"Beckett, I have had my ass served to me on a platter for the last three hours starting with our surprise guest, Mr. Mayor, then continuing on with Commissioner Boyle, so this had better be good, I'm really not in the mood for any more grade school theatrics by you."

"Sir, I understand, Sir, but this will only take a moment and will give you the full story of his resignation Sir."

"Come in and shut the door, Beckett, and this had better be good," as he opened his side desk drawer, pulled out a bottle of Advil, emptied 4 tablets into his palm, and chased them down with a glass of single malt liquor Kate recognized as the same brand that Castle drank, probably a present to Roy.

"Sir have you checked your top middle desk drawer, I got information from Rick's publicist that he left you and I both letters before he had left to take his daughter to Princeton on Friday, I found mine Sir, and I think yours is located there."

Roy opened the drawer, moved one folder then yelled, "Son of a Bitch, he did leave a letter, I wish I had known this on Monday when I was getting raked over the coals by Mayor Weldon."

Kate recognized the letter to be the exact same copy as hers, except Rick had added a personal note to Roy's one that she could not make out from her vantage point.

Roy read the letter slowly, then opened the drawer another healthy splash of the malt liquor which he downed, then dropped the letter to his desk.

"Not a very glowing recommendation Beckett, even I could cut through the inuendo to see the barbs you, Demming and even Esposito got in on.

Your job is to protect your team, every member of that team, regardless of personal prejudice, can you say you did that Detective?"

"Sir, No Sir, I failed miserably in protecting Castle's rights not only as a volunteer consultant, but as a human being and I feel so ashamed of my actions."

"Well your letter is the letter of record, but here, read what Rick wrote to me, he didn't want this to make it into your file and cost you professionally. Yeah that sounds like a selfish, pompous, man on a sugar rush with no concern of anyone but himself to me Beckett, read the letter."

Kate picked up the letter, and skips over it, it was identical to where it got to her copy ended. There in Rick's distinct handwriting was a note to Roy.

 _Hi Roy,_

 _Sorry to pull this Houdini act on you without notice, but you and I both know that Beckett has already found someone she would rather be partners with anyway. They have made it quite clear that I'm not a cop, they have no idea of our history and I'd like to keep it that way. To Demming I am just another author of Nancy Drew mysteries. I wish I could take them back to be with us, for 5 minutes, just to open their eyes to the fact that sometimes we hide memories of extreme horror with humor, and the good guys don't always come out without some scars. Again, Cap I'm sorry, where I'm going the seals couldn't find me so don't waste any energy, and all of the alias you knew have all been recycled with new. I wish I could tell you more, but for now let's leave it at I hope to see you when I get back, you were always a great friend that had my six,_

 _Stay Safe_

 _Rick_

Kate reads the letter and once again breaks down in tears. From what she has just read, Rick appeared to have spent time with Roy before the 12th, the line about hiding horror with humor especially hurt, since it was her that coined the nickname Wise Ass, for him, if she only knew.

Montgomery is looking out through the window, perhaps reliving some memory of his earlier life, his face showing the sad lines, almost like he is grieving for a friend. He had just been handed an ultimatum from 1PP Fix or Replace his best squad, He jerks to realization when he notices Beckett still sitting in his office and tries to cover his emotion.

"Sir, your letter has a personal message from Rick, and I can only guess that you have know him before his exposure to the 12th, we didn't know Sir."

Roy's eyes come ablaze now, almost spewing fire, "Hell No you don't know, but do you want to know why Beckett? It's because you had already labeled him a Playboy womanizer from page six of the Times, and never even bothered to try to find out one thing about him.

The man knew everything about you, and I would wager you couldn't tell me one personal fact about him that isn't available on the web site."

" _ **Get out of my office Beckett**_ , in fact Get out of this station, take the next 3 days off while I figure out how the hell to handle this."

Montgomery turned a folder over and opens up requests for transfer from Kevin Ryan and Javier Esposito, and under position requested, both had put, Any Open. Perhaps it was time to rethink Kate Beckett as the lead detective he sure as hell couldn't lose both Espo and Ryan at one time, so he needed to come up with something.

A shell shocked Beckett, stumbled out of Roy's office, she knew that Roy had voiced his command loud enough so that everyone in the bull pen had heard him, so she grabbed her purse, phone and keys and left the station, her eyes finally spilled over when she made it through the steps to the ground.

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **8:45 AM Same Day**

Rick and Trey walked through the lobby of the hospital, headed for the General Session room, where each day started. As they made their way along the gift shop, Trey stopped for a moment, and admired a beautiful cross, hanging on a silver chain from one of the display racks as her hand reached down and intertwined her fingers with Rick's.

"You like that cross Trey?" Rick asked with softness and reassurance in his voice.

"Yeah, I do Rick, I told you I was Catholic and somedays Faith is all I had to get me by, well till you came along" as she smiled at him.

"Let's get going or we'll be late" she chides Rick as he started for the Gift Shop door, "I don't want you to buy me everything I say I like, my place isn't big enough to hold all of it" she laughed"

"Well, you know I would, don't you? Just say the word and what you want is yours" he smiles at her.

"I know Rick, but I care about you, not the things you can or do buy me, I never was that type of girl, and living the life I did, I learned to make it on very little."

"Well, I appreciate that, and I know you aren't in this to see how much money you can get, you didn't even know my real name when we struck up this friendship. I could have been a poor aspiring author, for all you knew."

Trey gives him her GEC as Rick had named it, Green Eye Glare, and they both laugh.

They had reached the room for the session, and today was pretty much a copy of yesterday except more detail was added to the presentation of what to expect, the freezing then boiling was good signs that the treatments had worked the first day. It seemed like there was a surprise waiting for them each day of treatment as the "cocktails" were modified on blood tests taken each day. Rick and Trey were both very glad they had opted for the one-time pain of a PICC line rather than being stuck each day.

The day progressed much like the previous, Trey napping while leaning on Rick's shoulder, and him eventually falling asleep once he knew Trey was OK. At the end of the day surprising both felt a bit more energy than the day before, which again was a positive sign. The doctors said little subtle changes such as energy levels, and tastes for certain foods could accompany treatments, it varied from patient to patient.

"Hey Rick, how are you feeling, well enough to go out for dinner tonight, or is it Room Service?

"You read my mind beautiful, let's go out if you feel like it, what do you have a taste for?"

"I could really go for some good home made Italian, and I know a spot where no one will bother you or us,"

"Lead the way Madam"

Trey gives an address to the driver, and he replied, "that address is in Mississauga Madam, is this where you wish to go?"

"Yes, thank you for checking" Trey replied with a smile on her face.

Twenty minutes later they pull up in front of a building, which could be anything, factory, retail stores or offices, and then Rick spots a light in the corner of the bottom floor, with a small sign, "Mama Rae's".

"Is this the place Trey, Rick smiles as he takes her hand in his, and gently directs her that direction,

"Sure is, and it hasn't changed a bit, the owner is, well was a good friend on my Mom's and they used to trade recipes, this is all home made with Mama's own recipes."

They enter, and from out of no where an elderly lady comes around the counter to embrace Trey,

"My child how long has it been, since your Mom's funeral, No? That's too long to wait to come see your Mama Rae, and ooh who do we have here, maybe that's why you haven't been by, too busy kissy face" as she laughs

Trey's face lights up beet red, "Mama Rae, this is Rick, he is a very good friend I met recently, and I told him I knew of the best Italian restaurant in all of Canada."

"My Child, even an old lady like me can see this is Rick Castle, the famous author, how did you hook such a catch,"

Now Trey is totally embarrassed, and Rick steps forward to save her.

"Mama Rae, may I call you that? I was new in Toronto and stopped by the Diner, where Trey helped me out, and to answer your question it was I who made the move on your God Daughter here, she is just so beautiful."

Rick is now engulfed with the little old lady hugging him as well, "Please take care of her Mr. Castle, she is such a trusting soul, and has a heart of gold."

"Oh, I will, but can we eat, then talk Mama, we are starved" he laughed

The dinner was more than Rick could have asked for, he had been in 5-star restaurants that could learn things from Mama Ray, then as she brought the capo chinos, she joined them for a few minutes of chat,

"Trey, I have missed you so please come back, and bring Rick with you, it was so nice meeting him, and I must say you look so much more rested. Please take care of yourselves and I will see you again soon, Eh?"

The ride back to the hotel was relaxing as Trey leaned her head on Rick's shoulder and he draped his arm over her to pull her close.

"Thanks for a beautiful evening Trey, I don't think I have had food that good in quite a while, and the company was even better."

"You're always so sweet Rick, well three more up mornings till we have a weekend to enjoy, do you want to start planning it when we get to the room?

"That would be great, just in case we need reservations for anything, Good Plan Trey,"

The night is filled with laughter and thoughts of what to do, The Zoo was first on their list, followed by the Royal Museum, all based on weather and how they felt they had a tentative trip Toronto Islands or the Distillery District again depending on weather and how each felt.

The first two days of the fight for their lives were totally different than each had expected, the beautiful thing was that each understood the highs and lows of the other, without having to say a word, and no matter how far this relationship travelled, a beautiful friendship had been forged, not ever to be broken.

Trey turned to kiss Rick goodnight, and felt a lump under her pillow, turning the light back on she pulled out a box,

"Rick, did you do this? Why? as she opened it and it was a much more expensive version of the cross, she had seen in the Hospital Gift Shop, and a beautiful double braided chain,

"Yes, I did, and why, because your smile and the look in your eyes when you are happy are worth more to me and anything right now, do you like it?

She pulls him in for a deep kiss, and then smacks him on the arm.

"The kiss was my thank you, the hit was you have to listen to me Rick, you can't keep spoiling me, I'll get used to it and when you're gone I won't know what to do."

"Trey, let's deal with this one day at a time, let me spoil you because we both know, more so than most, our tomorrows like everyone else's aren't guaranteed, OK? Now can I have a repeat of that kiss, but keep the hit, you have a punch" as she engulfs his mouth, the night overtakes them, and they fall asleep her head on his shoulder,

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Dropped Call

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 9**

 **Previously**

" _ **Get out of my office Beckett**_ _, in fact Get out of this station, take the next 3 days off while I figure out how the hell to handle this."_

 _Montgomery turned a folder over and opens up requests for transfer from Kevin Ryan and Javier Esposito, and under position requested, both had put, Any Open. Perhaps it was time to rethink Kate Beckett as the lead detective he sure as hell couldn't lose both Espo and Ryan at one time, so he needed to come up with something._

 **12** **th** **Precinct**

 **3:00 PM**

 **Same Day**

Montgomery had been in a foul mood, worse than anyone had seen him since he took command. His door had stayed shut and at some period he had drawn the shades. He had been on the phone non-stop since Beckett left, and it wasn't a coincidence that the Police Union Reps had joined him a short while ago.

Espo looked at Ryan, "Bro, this is bad, and I think it's Beckett that's gonna get hurt on this one."

"I know Bro but there's nothing we can do, hell if we warn her, we'll be facing whatever she is, God knows what that is."

 **Inside Montgomery's Office**

 **3:20 PM**

"So before I make this call, we are 100% in agreement, Union, and Management, Beckett is to undergo Sensitivity Training for minimum of 3 sessions over a period of 8 weeks, during this time the lead detective role will be handled for the first 4 weeks by Detective Ryan, then Detective Esposito will lead the last 4 weeks.

If further training or action is required by the NYPD Psychiatrist, then we will determine the status of Detective Beckett then, whether she be permentantly demoted to Detective, or undergo more treatment. If she resists or declines either to step down, or attend therapy, it will be grounds for termination without cause or recall. This the agreement, and is witnessed by the Chief of Detectives, and Commissioner Boyle." Roy asks

Everyone agreed, so now the action was on Roy to inform all involved. He decided Beckett had the right to know first, so he locked his door, and closed the blinds as he made the call.

"Beckett, how can I help you Sir?"

"First please sit down, I usually have these discussions in my office, but I can't wait till you return, due to circumstances beyond all our control.

Beckett, you've had a great career and rose up the ranks faster than anyone in our precinct, **BUT** your actions of late have left a lot of those in power to wonder was it too much too fast."

"But Sir I*"

"Save it Beckett, and don't interrupt me again, this is coming down on you but has impacted me as your CO as well. Effective immediately, once your suspension is served, you will report back, but as Detective, not Lead Detective, you will report to Detective Ryan for 4 weeks, and then Detective Esposito for an additional 4 weeks.

During that time, you are **REQUIRED** to seek sensitivity training paid for by the NYPD, conducted by Dr. Carter Burke, NYPD Psychiatrist for a minimum of 3 sessions.

Failure to attend any session, or if you are unwilling to accept your temporary change in command will result in your dismissal, approved by the president of your Union, Commissioner Boyle and the Chief of Detectives Haller.

You will not be considered fit to resume your role as Lead Detective, until cleared by Dr. Burke. If you are unable to resume your normal duties after 8 weeks, the move to Detective is permanent, and you must follow all regulations to process any further promotions. A permanent replacement for Lead Detective will be made at that time.

Do you have any questions Detective Beckett? A formal registered letter stating what was verbally relayed to you was sent to you an hour ago, you must sign and return either by registered post, or hand deliver to the HR Department, Do not attempt to enter the precinct or your normal work station until cleared to do so. Are we clear, and do you understand all that we have discussed today?"

"Yes Sir" Beckett barely gets out as she stumbles to her couch. Her job, that's all she's had for years and now, she may not have that? She has to work for Ryan and Javi? Her mind is flooded with thoughts, then she realizes Montgomery is speaking again,

"I'm sorry sir, could you repeat that last part?"

"I said, this was the toughest call I have ever had to make, and not only is your Ass on the line, so is mine, so think wisely Detective, for both our sakes, Good Bye" then the line is dead.

Roy opens his desk takes the glass, puts it back and then just turns the bottle of single malt up to his lips, then sits with his head in his hands for a few minutes, to gain his composure, then steps to his door,

"Esposito, Ryan, my office now!" his voice booms across the entire floor, everyone is abuzz with the gossip and rumors, no one knew for sure.

Ryan looks at Espo like What the hell did you do now and gets up and meekly follows him into Captain Montgomery's office.

"Close the door, and keep your mouths shut, until I finish, and if I hear one word of this come back to me one or both of you will be directing traffic for the NY Giants football games, you got that?"

"Sir, Yes Sir"

"Sit down, I just got off the phone with Beckett, the Commissioner and others have forced me to either correct the problem or get rid of it, and I only have a short time to prove I have a cure in place.

Effective immediately Beckett is reduced to Detective, for the next four weeks this team will be lead by you Detective Ryan, and then Detective Esposito you will take the following four weeks, Beckett returns in three days and will be the third member of your team. During this 8-week time frame Beckett will be evaluated and undergo Sensitivity training and then based on he Doctor's evaluation, and the review board a final determination will be made as to what grade level Detectives Beckett will hold, if any. Her failure to obey any part of this order will bring about her resignation which will be accepted without prejudice or review.

Let me be perfectly clear, this is the best situation I can come up with any hope of re-forming the top performing homicide team in all of New York. Your requests for transfers have been denied, you must reapply if you still desire to do so after this time period of evaluation of Detective Beckett is concluded. I will NOT stand for any more cut-throat activities towards any member of the NYPD or any others that will work with us. Is that clear?

"Sir, Yes Sir" comes the answer in unison once again.

Any Questions"

Ryan looks at Espo, who nods then he speaks "Sir, would he be possible for us to possibly retain Castle for our team? I mean he left under circumstances that were less than favorable but Sir he was a great asset to the team, one we miss very much"

"Good question Ryan, but unfortunately, I have no way of getting in touch with him, and frankly I doubt he would come back until there is final disposition of Beckett's status, even if at all. Feel free to pursue it, BUT his daughter and mother are both off limits, do not contact them, is that understood?"

"Yes Sir"

"Any other questions,"

"No Sir" then get out of here and send any nosy nellies to me, do not disclose this agreement until I clear it, that's all **Dismissed"**

Esposito and Ryan are shaken to their core, Beckett had been a Detective only about 6 months longer than they, but she had been the heir apparent to Lead Detective, Jim Cannon who retired shortly after they joined, leaving the opening to Beckett. She had been to date their only boss, and Kevin was struggling on how he was going to assume the opposite role.

"Let's grab a beer, any place but a cop bar," Javi suggests

"Lead the way, Ryan replies, and definitely no cop bars."

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **3:45 PM Same Day**

Rick and Trey had a full day today, not only was there infusion, but they also took a 30-minute course in physical therapy. Stretching muscle areas that could be diminished for lack of better terminology, lack of use.

Women were given a set of Yoga exercises to deal with the cervical area, and the men to work on areas that supported the male reproductive sections. The program had talked about holistic approach, but the therapy and exercises caught most off guard.

Once the initial shock and in some cases embarrassment, they began the exercises and could feel areas of the body begin to loosen up. Since the gene re-programming portion of the program was such a vital part of not only killing the cancer present but also training other areas to be prepared to attack cancer cells if they attempted to invade healthy cell areas, the PT was very important in the holistic approach.

As they left the hospital, tired but with more strength than they had had just a few days ago both were beginning to feel just a bit of optimism creep in. Trey takes Rick's hand, and asks,

"Hey Stud, up for a visit tonight?"

"Well, I would rather spend all night in your arms but yes, I feel up to it, are we going out or are they coming to us, and who is the mystery guest?"

"Out, I thought we would swing by the Diner and see how things are going with Jack, and the staff, I promise no working, or worrying OK?" as she reaches over and kisses him sweetly.

"Ooh that sounds great, the first place I laid eyes on you, and*"

"No and Rick, we stick to our diets, we can't get you sick on me and get set back in treatment. I promise you, once we're done, I will or have the chef make you anything you want, including Poutine, all you can eat"

"That's evil woman, how you can just read my mind like that, I mean it's like you know what I'm thinking and going to say before I say it."

"That's because we're connected at a deeper level, some call Soul Mates, others use other terms, but I'm closer to you than I have been with any other man, hell any person, at any time in my life, scary huh?"

"Not scary at all, I feel the same about you, two broken marriage, and a two year long quest to be the knight in shinning armor for Beckett, and I feel closer to you than any of them."

"Speaking of Rick, and don't get this wrong, I Love You, I really do, and I want to give us a chance, but I don't want you staying with me because of the Cancer, or because we work well together.

If there's ever a chance you can fix things between you and Kate, do it. Don't hold back on my part, I mean the farthest you are going to get with me is 2nd base for a while and maybe never get a chance to go any farther I won't hold you back from other women, it's not fair to you," as she finished tears pool in her eyes,

"Trey, you just have to trust me, I'm with you, I'm right where I need to be at this moment, and I would never cheapen the love we have for each other by settling, and you have to make the same promise to me.

If you ever become attracted to someone else, your life's mate, please tell me, I love you enough to wish you happiness, stay in your life as much as you'll let me, but stand aside.

Like you say, I want to give us a chance as well, once we're done with all of these outside distractions, you know the little C word that everyone throws out. No matter what happens, I want you to be happy, healthy and successful, if that's with me, I will be proud, if someone else steals your heart, then he will be one lucky guy," as hard as he fought it one tear trickled from Rick's eye.

"Hey, sorry to be a downer, but I needed to say that Rick, Thanks for listening, and even more Thanks for Loving Me in a way that doesn't choke me from other people or emotions. I can't, I won't go back to a relationship where I am controlled on everything I do."

"Nor would I ever want you do, hey there's the diner, dry your eyes or Jack will think we have bad news"

Her reply is a sweet kiss and "Thank You, Rick" and they exit the car and enter the diner to a standing ovation. Jack is around the counter hugging his sister, and first starts to shake Rick's hand, then pulls him in for a Bro hug instead.

The evening is spent with food, laughs, and a true hope for a better future for Trey for the first time she can remember, Rick smiles and laughs but is silently hoping he can win this beautiful ladies heart, but also is preparing himself for the day she will walk away, just like all the rest, they all walk away sooner or later.

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

Dropped Call

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 10**

 **Previously**

"Save it Beckett, and don't interrupt me again, this is coming down on you but has impacted me as your CO as well. Effective immediately, once your suspension is served, you will report back, but as Detective, not Lead Detective, you will report to Detective Ryan for 4 weeks, and then Detective Esposito for an additional 4 weeks.

During that time, you are **REQUIRED** to seek sensitivity training paid for by the NYPD, conducted by Dr. Carter Burke, NYPD Psychiatrist for a minimum of 3 sessions.

 **Obrien's Pub and Grille**

 **Lexington at 45** **th**

 **6:15 PM Same Day**

Ryan and Javi are seated at the table in the back, sipping on their beers, and both very sad that their friend was going through these tough times, it was brutal to think how far this latest chain of events had occurred and the fallout from it.

"Javi, I don't know how I'm going to do it, and God knows I need my job, especially now with the wedding planning going on and everything, but how is Beckett going to take being the one receiving the orders, especially with the moods she has been in lately"

"I think that's the point Kev, Montgomery had to do something, sounds like he was getting his chain pulled pretty hard from the Mayor and Commissioner, so what choice did he have"

"Do you think us requesting transfers caused this demotion for Beckett, Javi, and be honest?"

"Well look at it from Montgomery's point of view, the mayor has already chewed his ass out about losing Castle, and now he has to replace two of the detectives that worked with the team, leaving only Beckett from the top performing squad in New York? How the hell is he going to protect her from that? So yes, I think it had something to do with it, **BUT** I also think that Beckett brought this on herself, she's gotten worse as the years have gone by and this last stunt with Demming, was inexcusable."

"I know she caused it but man I hate that she got herself in this much trouble, I'm just trying to get her the Lead Detective job back, I don't want the damn thing, but I don't want to have my ideas, suggestions and input in cases trashed, like lately when all she would listen to was Demming, who works Robbery for God's sake."

"I feel the same way Kev, I just wish we could talk to her to let her know how we feel. I hope she's not on one of her self-pity parties and is blaming everyone but herself for what happened. By the way I told Lanie she may want to just drop by tonight, that Beckett might need a friend for sure, Kate can tell her what's going on without us getting in trouble."

"That's a good idea Javi, how did Lanie take it?"

"I'm not getting any boy friend of the year votes from her anytime soon, but I think she'll stop by, one she's nosy and two they've been friends for years and have had blowups before, not this big, but still they remained friends."

"Well I hope Beckett is willing to admit she fucked up, because Lanie is not one to put up with excuses, and I never would have thought she would act like that on purpose."

"That's what steamed Lanie so bad, Kate told her she didn't have feelings for Rick, so Lanie was working on hooking him up with Karpowski or Hastings, just so he wouldn't have to be the third wheel, plus if Kate saw what she was doing to Rick, maybe she would wake up.

She told her to go ahead, she had no feelings then when push comes to shove, she dumps Demming to try to go to the Hampton's with Rick and we all know how that worked out. Once again, a Lie that made Lanie look foolish to both Ann and Roz, she was pissed plus she likes Rick and thought he got a shitty deal."

Kevin had just poured the remaining beer into each of their glasses from the pitcher when Javi's phone chirped with a text. Kevin thought oh shit, are we on call tonight and we've been drinking, but Javi stood and held up a finger,

"It's Lanie Kev, why don't you go settle our tab and I'll see what's up", as he placed a $10 Bill on the table.

Kev was making his way to the exit that he saw Javi walk through, to call Lanie after settling the tab and as he approached him, he heard,

"Are you sure Lanie, I don't know if that's a good idea with the moods that Beckett has been in lately, besides I have to check with Kevin to see if he and Jenny got something going tonight. I'll call you right back"

"What was all that about Javi, you know Jenny is out with her sister and girlfriends and I have all night"

"Lanie said that Kate asked to meet with us at her place to talk, she knows this is going to be awkward for everyone and she's trying to make it easier from the start. I didn't know how you felt about it."

"Well Javi, we have to talk to her sooner or later, and at least if she pisses us off, we just get up and leave and there's no one watching it. We can try it but if she comes at us, I'm out of there, you and I both know neither one of us asked for this job, but we can hear her out."

Javi pulled out his phone and texted Lanie, _"Kev and I are on the way be there in about twenty, not taking ANY enemy fire as a heads up. JE_

" _Wouldn't expect you too, I'm in the same boat, see you soon, XoXo Lp is_ the reply that comes almost instantly

"Come on Kev, let's get this over with and flush out the elephant in the room as they hail a cab.

 **Beckett's Apartment**

 **8:45 PM Same Day**

The knock on the door is answered almost immediately by a very disheveled and contrite Kate Beckett.

"Guys, Thanks for coming, I wasn't sure that you would" as she hugs each of them tightly for a moment longer than usual,

"Kate, I want to say, I'm sorry you're going through this, we both are sorry, but I also understand that Montgomery was having his feet held over a fire to do something" Javi says quietly,

"I know Javi, what happened was all on me, Roy told me my job as Lead was to protect my people, all of them, and I failed miserably and played some stupid high school game to try to impress Castle, it hurt him, and all of us, and Guys, I mean this I am so very sorry, I would take it back if I could.

You don't know how many times I've heard criminals confess and then utter those same words, and I thought how pathetic, so I guess you know how I feel about my status now."

Kevin speaks up, "I'm sure you and Lanie have talked as well as Montgomery and you know the situation with the team, and the awkwardness it's going to be when you come back, which by the way we didn't say a word, Montgomery will have out nuts if he finds out.

Kate, I did get the approval to reach out to Castle, but not his mother or daughter, so I wasn't sure if you had tried or knew something that could help us get him back."

"Kevin, he's gone, no one knows where, Alexis is in the summer program at Princeton and Martha is doing summer stock in London, the only one who can reach him is Paula Haas, she has burner phones he keeps changing every so often. Wherever he is, he doesn't want to be found.

I left him that terrible voice mail that you got the copy of, and then tried to call and apologize, he blocked me from his landline and his building, I called Gina, and she has to call Paula for everything as well, so I can only tell you that I have reached out through Paula several times, his only response was "Tell her I received her Voice Mail, I am working on a proper response, I'm sorry to have been such a burden on everyone there"

"Wow, that doesn't sound like the Castle we know, he would have taken you back in a minute with just your side comment, sorry, so what ever is bugging him is really big," Javi says,

It's not lost on Kate the contempt in his voice when he talked of a friend who she had hurt badly. "Guys, not my call anymore, and Lord knows should have never been, but here is Paula's number, maybe if you call and tell him what's going on Kevin, you'll get a more positive response."

"Well it's worth a try, God knows things aren't the same without him, plus all the people that he helped, and we never knew about it. Do you know Mary from the sandwich shop we grab lunch at when Remy's is too crowded? Seems her son needed an operation and they had a Go Fund me setup, till Rick just paid for everything, he tried to do it anonymously, but Betty knew, we all did." Kevin replied softly,

Kate slips a piece of paper with Paula's contact information to Kevin,

"Guys, for what it's worth, and I know not much at this point, I'm sorry, so very sorry and I will do whatever I can to make it right. Kevin you're lead when I come back, so I expect you to act like the lead, I'll follow your orders and when old habits sneak in, crack back on me, that's your job and they will be watching us all."

After her friends left, Kate felt a little better, she knew it was going to be a struggle to earn their friendship back, but at least they came to hear her apology, that was something she had to figure out how to get Rick to at least see her for a short while. Javi, was the one she was surprised by the most, how distant and bitter he seemed, but she did hurt two of his friends, Demming and Rick so perhaps he had the right to be double pissed at her, she would need to make it right to all.

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **1:45 PM Friday**

Rick and Trey had been diligent in all of their exercises, treatment, and diet and this was the day they had looked forward to, their first free time away from the hospital. Treatment had only gone till 12:30 PM today, and now they were waiting to consult with the doctors about their lab work, to see if any signs of the treatment working could be found.

"Richard Gates", called the nurse, and Rick had almost forgotten his alias, as Trey nudged him and he got up to head for the consult area pulling Trey along with him.

"Rick, I don't think they will let me hear how you're doing, I mean I don't have any claim or I'm not*"

He holds his fingers across her lips gently, as he responds to the nurse,

"I'm Rick Gates, and this is Trey Boland my Medical Power of Attorney for this, as well as one of your patients in the trial. Can she come back with me, I mean I think we have HIPPA laws covered,"

"The nurse smiles, Rick, we're in Canada, sign this waiver for Personal Information Protection and Electronic Documents Act (PIPEDA), and you can have whoever you want with you in front of the doctor."

Trey looks up at him, "Are you sure Rick, I mean this is very private."

"I'm sure, and I'm not expecting you to do the same, just so you know, I mean your brother is here, but I want someone to know where this ship is headed."

"Rick? When did you make me your Medical Power of Attorney?"

"The night you stayed with me at the Orion, and we talked half the night away."

"Please don't get me wrong, I'm honored but Sweetie, you have a Mother, and a Daughter don't you think they would be better choices than me, I mean we know a lot about each other but I'm not sure I'm the one who should be making that big of a decision, God Forbid it comes to that."

"Hey, I know, I'm sorry I should have asked you first, I didn't mean to put you in a bad position, but my Mother is out of the Country, and my Daughter is a minor, so if you notice, I have a backup as well. Gregg DeLeaver, he's my Oncologist from New York, so all you need to do is hold the fort till Gregg gets here if as you say God Forbid it comes to that"

"Rick, I'm not sure I can handle hearing your news, I mean if it's not good, then I'm not sure what I will do, and if yours are good and mine are bad, then, it just raises all sorts of personal issues for me, forgive me but I'll stay out here."

Rick is stunned, but recovers well, "Sure Trey, I never considered what I would be putting you through, I'm sorry. I'll meet you here as soon as we get the results, and you can share or not share whatever you wish."

"Rick, I'm sorry, you've been so sweet to me, and I have deep feelings for you, but I want to make sure they are there because of you, not the cancer and I sure as hell don't want you with me because of the disease, try to understand please?" as she kisses him on the cheek.

"Hey I got it, no problem, division of Church and State, we keep our medical lives separate from our private lives, that way the two won't bleed over and we will be sure of our feelings when this is over, I think that sums it up doesn't it?" As he smiles but Trey knows it's not the genuine smile, she usually gets.

"I'll be back" as he follow the nurse through the door, Trey watches as he rips the waiver into small pieces and deposits it in the trash, Did she just trash any hope of being with the best thing that ever happened to her?

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 11**

 **Previously**

" _Rick, I'm sorry, you've been so sweet to me, and I have deep feelings for you, but I want to make sure they are there because of you, not the cancer and I sure as hell don't want you with me because of the disease, try to understand please?" as she kisses him on the cheek._

" _Hey I got it, no problem, division of Church and State, we keep our medical lives separate from our private lives, that way the two won't bleed over and we will be sure of our feelings when this is over, I think that sums it up doesn't it?" As he smiles but Trey knows it's not the genuine smile, she usually gets._

" _I'll be back" as he follow the nurse through the door, Trey watches as he rips the waiver into small pieces and deposits it in the trash, Did she just trash any hope of being with the best thing that ever happened to her?_

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **1:45 PM Friday**

Shortly after Rick is called, Trey's name is called to visit with her doctor to review the progress 1 week, or 25 % of the way into treatment. Doctor Karen Packard was the coordinating physician for the women's trial and was the doctor Trey was meeting with.

Trey tried very hard to get a read on her as she was escorted into the office, but Dr. Packard was stoic in her expression until Trey had been seated and offered a refreshment by the assistant who promptly left once she was ready for the doctor.

"Tell me Trey how have the treatments been to you, any significant problems, or issues good or bad?"

"Well if you mean feeling like your blood is boiling and traveling throughout your entire body, one moment, then as quickly as the heat it turned into cold, so cold I shivered under two blankets. The technicians said that was a good sign that the treatment was working so I guess other than that and severe fatigue the first two days, it's been better than I expected, definitely better than what has been described to me by those going through traditional Chemo Radiation regimens."

"Good, Good to hear" Dr. Packard replied "and I agree with the technicians, it is always a good sign when we get that response to the body's acceptance and rejection to the markers we are inserting into the blood supply."

"Do you have any idea now that you are 25% complete with this trial, how your cancer is responding, I mean has your body changed in anyway to you that only you would notice."

"Well, this is embarrassing, but for the first time in years, I got turned on by a man, I mean really turned on to where I needed to stop before I did something that will jeopardize my spot in this trial. Prior to starting this last week, I had zero desire, I mean I could have seen Brad Pitt naked on my couch and I would have rather read a good book than to pursue him."

Dr. Packard laughs, and then quickly responds, "Trey, I'm not laughing at you, but with you, I had your identical form of Cancer and Sex was a topic my ex husband could never understand. It just didn't interest me at any time of the month, so I know from experience what you're talking about.

Can I ask you is it just one man that makes you feel this way or do you as they say get the hots for a sexy man on the street?"

Trey blushes, "Doctor right now it's just one man, I haven't dared look at men, but HE makes me feel whole even though I'm not, I know he cares deeply, but I want to be sure it's me he cares for and not just wanting to take care of me because of my Cancer, it's sound dumb, but I guess it's my phobia."

"It's not dumb at all, quite the contrary, it's wise to protect your heart but Trey, don't put armor around it, you'll wind up shutting him out and believe me men like Rick are hard to find in today's world."

"Rick? I never mentioned any names; how did you know it was him?"

"Trey, the man is the target of every woman in the study, some are even married and some of the staff are even interested in him, so it's not hard to see he only has eyes for you. He's been really good for you in fact are you ready to look at the markers for your first week?"

The slides had two column of numbers all with ranges and 4 major classifications on the sides, "Trey the numbers on the LEFT are yours from yesterday morning blood samples and latest notes from psychological evaluation sessions, the numbers on the right indicate where we would like the patients to be at this time in the trial.

As you can see you are at the top or exceed in all categories except, one, that is emotional support, you still haven't let go to allow someone in to really assist you in not only accepting this but also coming up with a plan.

It's not good enough to say OK I have cancer so I'm going home and wait to die, there are many more factors in that, and we encourage patients to discuss options for the future, with someone they trust.

Some physicians stress that healing is more mental than physical, we tend to say mental state has much to do with the success or failure of the treatment, so you have three more weeks to adjust that."

"Doctor do you think Rick would be strong enough to discuss this with, I mean he has hinted that he wanted me in his treatment results, but I pushed back because I really don't want to be a rebound, he is hurt, angry and I think head over heels in love with someone who treated him terribly.

I don't want him to sacrifice any chance of having a life with her because I caught him on the rebound."

"Trey what I think is you need to be honest with him, if you just push back without telling him what you just told me, he is going to put you in the category of woman who just hurt him, and he will move on quickly, since he has seen the frustration of trying to change, or living a lie.

You MUST be honest with him, and if you are strong enough, yes, share this with Rick and let him share his with you. We won't know whose cancer is under control for months after the treatment is concluded, so every participant need someone to lean on, it is tough times for you all."

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **1:45 PM Friday**

 **Rick's visit**

The doctors had taken a similar approach to Rick's first week's results except he had a surprise visitor to guide him through his, as he opened the door, he was facing the back of a rather large man like himself, then

"About time you got your ass in here, how are you feeling Rick?" It was Gregg DeLeaver his best friend and a friend of the head of the study.

"I'm feeling better now than I did on Monday, why didn't you tell me the first course was to boil me in oil, then insert dry ice in my veins so I would freeze," he laughs,

"That's great Rick, which means the treatment is working. Going over your numbers you look good, as he presents the same slide that Trey had seen, except we have some concerns about the emotional markers, they have declined since Monday, anything going on that we should be aware of?"

"No, of course not Gregg, well I mean I met a lady and I thought we were getting along pretty well but she pushed back a bit, just recently, and I'm not sure if it's because she's not ready or not ready for me. She's a patient in the Cervical Cancer trial so we haven't had any physical contact that would be construed love, so maybe I'm just rushing her."

"Well you know what Rick, I think you need to close things down in New York before Trey will be willing to gamble on anything more than a deep friendship with you."

"Wait, how did you know her name was Trey and what do you know about New York and the issues there?"

"Rick, we have common friends, the Boyles do you think the friggin Police Commissioner is not going to tell me something about one of our Best Friends, come on now."

"So, you made it a point to fly up here and what Gregg, be sure I wasn't getting ready to off myself because the life as I knew it in New York has turned to shit? Was that why you came or what's going on?"

"Ok Rick the truth, you know Gina still loves you, probably will till the die she dies, so she pointed out that you had gone off grid before but never this badly. I gave her the standard answer clearing your head, character development, and she stopped me and said Gregg he's in mourning for his Detective, I don't know what she did, but she really hurt him this time and he ran, and will not come back.

I did some investigating, well I should say I had lunch with Tom Boyle and got an earful about the changes going on at the 12th since you left. Kate has been suspended for three days, demoted for 8 weeks pending she pass sensitivity training and Kevin Ryan is running the squad the first 4 weeks and Esposito the last 4 weeks.

It's a friggin mess, and if Roy can't get it straightened out it may cost him his shield. I'm surprised they haven't reached out to you yet for help."

"Kate has, but I'm in no mood to talk to her, but now that this is impacting Roy, well that changes things. In the meantime, I'll tell Paula to have Kevin call me on one of my burner cells, to see what I can do, Gregg, you didn't say a word about where I was or what's going on did you?"

"Rick, I couldn't even if I wanted to, which I don't."

"Well how long are you in town for, couple of days?"

"I wish, I fly back tomorrow, so if you haven't made plans, thought maybe we could do dinner, either the two of us or if Trey wants to join us, she is welcome."

"Well we were going to the zoo, but since the weather has turned a bit gloomy dinner sounds better let me check with her. I'll text you when she is out, and I ask her"

Trey is pacing nervously as she waits for Rick to get out of his meeting, he went in before her and if he did get bad news what kind of a friend is she being, my God he would buy her the world if she asked for it.

"There you are, as she rushed to his arms and fell into an embrace, kissing him, I was so worried, I mean you went in before me and you weren't out, I thought you might have gotten upset and went to the hotel without me, but our car is still waiting, so I got really scared"

"No, I'm OK Trey, I just met with my friend Gregg and he was very thorough on everything, in fact since the weather has turned icky, he wants to go to dinner tonight, either the three of us, or just he and I if you're not up to it."

"No, No Rick, Dinner would be fine, but I'd like a few hours to freshen up say 6:00 PM we can meet him, I assume he is staying in our hotel"

Rick smiles, "you assume correctly as he fires off a text to Gregg _see you in the lobby at 6:00 Party of three, Rc"_

"Rick, I think we need to talk as well before we go out, I mean I think I hurt your feelings and I want to make sure you know exactly where I am coming from, can we talk before we meet him please?"

"Of course Trey, no problem we can talk before we go out," and there it is Rick thinks, how he hates those words, "We need to talk" but better to get it out early, at least he hasn't wasted two years yet.


	12. Chapter 12

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 12**

 **Previously**

" _Doctor do you think Rick would be strong enough to discuss this with, I mean he has hinted that he wanted me in his treatment results, but I pushed back because I really don't want to be a rebound, he is hurt, angry and I think head over heels in love with someone who treated him terribly._

 _I don't want him to sacrifice any chance of having a life with her because I caught him on the rebound."_

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada 3:00 PM Friday Same Day**

Rick had felt the change, ever so slight from Trey, she still showed she cared but the feeling that perhaps something deeper could develop between the two of them were fading, and quickly. The Ice Water thrown on the possibility had come just a few minutes earlier when she had uttered those famous words no one in any kind of a relationship ever wants to hear, "We need to talk", it was never good, so Rick was bracing himself for bad news on the car ride from the hospital to the hotel.

He was unaware of his surroundings or even that Trey had gently slid her hand into his, and laid her head of his shoulder, he was so lost in thought trying to prepare for yet another, let you down easy session, with a beautiful lady which he cared for deeply, he didn't hear her say,

"Rick, talk to me, I know something is going on inside so please share it with me?"

He remained motionless, replaying all the times he had gone through this, first with Kyra, choosing her mother's decision over any possibility of a life with him, then Meredith, who didn't even bother for the easy part, hell just fucked her director in his house and acted like it was part of the job description. Then Gina, perhaps the one he felt the worse about since she tried, and it was him that had asked for the talk, she wanted something he wasn't ready to share, she wanted to be part of his daughter's life.

The last two years, did they even count or was he just too stupid and arrogant to see the lady said no, he should have moved on years ago rather than try to win her heart. He would have saved himself a lot of heartache, and now embarrassment after the last several months.

"Rick, are you OK, come on talk to me," Trey had hold of his face now and was looking deep into his eyes,

"I'm fine Trey, just got lost in some thoughts, I didn't mean to worry you, I'll be OK."

They had arrived at the hotel and not a word more was said as they existed the limo, Rick being his courteous self as always, helping Trey out of the car, holding the door, allowing her to enter the elevator first, all tasks a gentleman would do, but Trey knew Rick was functioning on Auto Pilot, there was little if any of "her Rick" in any of his actions and his mind was still miles away.

As they entered the suite, Rick began the conversation still unaware that he had zoned out in the limo and had caused Trey to worry.

"Trey, I owe you an apology for earlier, it was presumptuous of me to assume that you would want to take on the role I designated your for without asking, I never considered how you might be impacted, I guess I assumed too many facts not even in evidence" as he smiles that public image smile, not her smile.

"Rick, it's I who should apologize, I can see now that you are hurt, and believe me, after hearing what you have been put through, just the pieces that I have, hurting you was the last thing I would ever want to do. I want to explain the reason WHY I said what I did, and please you have to listen."

"I'm listening, Trey, honest I am."

"Rick you missed an entire conversation in the limo, you missed me reaching for your hand to hold in mine, you missed me laying my head on your shoulder for the comfort you always give me, you were there in body Rick, but you had zoned out to somewhere I had never been."

Rick hung his head, "You're right I wasn't there was I. OK so let's discuss what you wanted to talk about then we can move on from there."

"See what you did, you acknowledged that you were hurting but you shut me out again, I am not Kate Rick, that's what I wanted to talk about. I don't want to be just a substitute for a woman you love with all of your heart.

You talk in your sleep, did you know that, and you sometimes say the most romantic things. At first, I thought they were about or too me, but then you called her name, not once but several times over the last week."

Trey starts to cry softly, "Rick, I don't want you settling , not for me, not for anyone, but before there could ever be an us, and we don't even know if that is possible, you have to resolve your feelings with and for her. It's not fair to even begin a relationship, hell we probably already went too far by sharing the bed, even though nothing happened, until we both have purged ourselves of the feelings we harbor for others."

"Trey, I didn't know I talked in my sleep, and if anything you are hearing dreams of how I wanted things to go then, **BEFORE** I met you, I can't take those back, but you're right, I need to resolve that mess before I involve anyone else, and forgive me, it was selfish of me to bring you into this."

"Rick, you didn't have to coax too hard, maybe I was a little to anxious to have someone care about how I felt, maybe I led you on and if so I am the one who is sorry. You have treated me like a queen, and for that I'll always be grateful, but I'm thinking positive, you made me believe again. One day when I am whole again, I want to give myself to a man who wants me, not someone he is imagining or wishing would be in his arms."

"So where do we go from here Trey, I mean my stuff is moved to my Bedroom, there isn't any reason we can't still be friends and be here for each other, unless, you want to change arrangements. I could always get another room, a*"

Trey stops him with a sweet kiss on the lips, "Rick, it's not that I don't want to be with you, it's that I'm afraid I will be replaced and I would rather not feel the feeling of your total love than to feel it and then lose it, I think it would destroy me. I do love you, but let's not rush this, I have to know that I'm not just a substitute for Kate, or you're doing this because of the Cancer, it's gotta be because that's how we both feel.

You in your room, me in mine to sleep doesn't mean we don't spend our free time together, you're my anchor, the reason I have hope that I can make it through this, and I don't want to change our friendship, does that make sense?"

Rick is deep in thought as he replays the scenarios with Kate, and others, and then snaps out of it, "Yes, sure it does, we're friends and like I said I want you to be healthy and happy so if that means we make adjustments now then that's what we do. Again, I pushed you, I'm sorry I was just trying to control everything and make everyone happy, and I guess sometimes I push too hard, forgive me."

"Rick, there's nothing to forgive, but I needed you to understand, I'm not like the others, I don't want to lead you on, then hurt you, even though I can tell you are hurt now, it would be worse if we took things farther then found out you still aren't over Kate, or I wasn't ready to jump into another relationship after the train wreck of a marriage I had."

"Yeah, you're absolutely right Trey, so you get ready, and I'll give you some privacy, I think I'm going to go for a walk, get some steps in then come back and shower for diner. I'll have the key cards changed while I'm at guest services."

"Rick there's no need for that" Trey says but as she turns around, she is alone, Rick's gone, and she knows he is hurt deeply. God why is love always so hard, and why is it the good guys are the ones to feel most of the pain?

Life sucks sometimes, it isn't fair but what could she do, she had feelings for Rick, but was it love? She didn't know for sure, but one thing she was certain of, she would never be anyone's proxy again. Rick loved Kate deeply, and once he resolved those feelings the path for her would be much clearer, right now she could only hope she did the right thing.

Rick's mind is a jumbled mess as he decided to take the stairs instead of the elevator, less chance of running into anyone wanting to strike up a conversation. As he is trying to organize his thoughts, he remembers Gregg's words about the 12th being a mess, and Roy might lose his shield. He as a friend, couldn't let that happen. Across the street was a sign flashing for Electronics and the latest innovations.

A thought comes to his mind, hell by now they should be available to the civilian world he thinks, and once again a dark flashback of his earlier days plays before him, lights flashing, sounds of missiles hitting their targets, Roy's face as he lay wounded, and shouting of voices all around him, and then it was gone, just as fast as it came. He shivered with the recollection he had fought so hard to forget, as he made his way across the street.

Rick enters the store and is greeted by the sales person, obviously on commission, as he starts to rattle off the day's deals and offers Rick halts him with just one finger raised,

"I'd like to see your Satellite phones,"

"Of course, Sir, the salesman leads him to a rack of Cell Phones,

"Excuse me I said Satellite phones, not cell phones,"

"Sir let me get my manager, I'm not sure what you are asking for, and then Rick picks up the slight French accent, apparently English was his second language. The manager comes out from the back and takes Rick to exactly what he is looking for, and in a minute, Rick replied,

"I'll take 3 of that model there if you have them in stock? IF not then this model as he points to the highest priced and second priciest phones on display. The manager comes back from the rear of the store with the three highest end phones and asked how would you wish to pay, as Rick handed over a wad of $500 bills, he first thought about his AMEX then when he reached for his wallet, it was covered with a shield, reminding him Credit Cards can be traced, Cash cannot.

After receiving his change and foregoing any additional offers Rick retreats to the hotel and makes his way to the roof, looking at his watch he sees it's 4:28 PM meaning he could catch Roy if he hurried. Roy was a creature of habit, 10:15 coffee break, 12:45 lunch, 3:45 coffee break, and all days but Friday he left at 6:30 PM, on days like to day he never stayed past 4:45 PM.

Glancing in the sky to the East direction, he positions the phone is the most ideal location, and then powers on, there is the signal bar, full strength. He hurriedly dials a number he knows by heart, one that Roy seldom uses but is always in his possession.

The phone rings twice then Rick hears, "This is a private number, and no solicitation calls are accepted,"

"Good, because I'm not selling anything, How you doing Roy, don't have long, but I understand we have a situation, as always Cap, no questions and don't try to trace this it will blow up in your face which is why I used the Corporations phone."

"Rick, if this is you, identify"

"Surely, Zebra Alpha, Nellie, 2539547"

"Son of a Bit*"

"No time for that Cap, we need to talk"

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 13**

 **Previously**

 _The phone rings twice then Rick hears, "This is a private number, and no solicitation calls are accepted,"_

" _Good, because I'm not selling anything, How you doing Roy, don't have long, but I understand we have a situation, as always Cap, no questions and don't try to trace this it will blow up in your face which is why I used the Corporations phone."_

" _Rick, if this is you, identify"_

" _Surely, Zebra Alpha, Nellie, 2539547"_

" _Son of a Bit*"_

" _No time for that Cap, we need to talk"_

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Rooftop Friday 4:30 PM**

"First question are we secure?

"Roger that, in my car sitting in traffic"

"I understand you have a situation that might need some assistance, I can't physically be back for three weeks, but can offer remote assistance if that helps."

"I take it you heard of the shit storm Beckett caused with Boyle and Mr. Mayor, they wanted her fired, and I had the grounds but I lied, if they find it, well I won't have to worry about being the Brett Favre of the NYPD."

"Roy, did my leaving cause this? I mean I can talk to Bob, and Boyle, but if it was something else driving it, then I need to know that."

"Well your leaving started a domino, when you didn't make it back to the party, guess we found out later you were stuck in that 6 hour traffic jam on your way back from dropping Alexis off, but at the time it came down as you had something better to do, and just blew it off."

"Roy, you know me better than that, I thought Beckett did as well, but I guess I really didn't know her as well as I thought I did.

"Anyway, she made a comment that Espo took offense at, and when he defended you, it started a row, then Lanie got in it and it was a shit storm all around, especially when Ryan and Espo found out from Beckett that you knew about the party, and your route, they were steamed she wouldn't have checked on your welfare.

Like I said things escalated, and Demming's captain filed a complaint, I never even presented it to Kate, just suspended her for three days while I tried to figure this shit out. Then out of the blue, right after I get back from a Royal ass chewing from Boyle and Weldon, I find requests for transfers from both Espo and Ryan. I couldn't approve or tell anyone up the chain or Beckett's career is over. "

"So, you ordered her to counseling and kept the boys happy for a while anyway? What happens after she completes the training Roy, or the first time Kate acts like well Kate, what then?"

"I'm hoping I have my confidant back by then Rick. No one knows we served, well I served you were there as part of the CIA, and should have been secured back at the barracks, but Thank God you were a Rebel then as you are now. I know my life would have been over if you hadn't come up when you did,"

"Roy, you know you're talking about things that never happened, you were wounded 2 months later defending your squad against a surprise attack, that's the official record and has to stay that way."

"I understand Rick, but why the protocol now, and I have to admit it's pretty damn smart to use my background, you know damn well I can't attempt to trace this call without disclosing my part, very clever Special Agent,"

"Roy, you were a hell of a Captain, both then and now, but your bluffs never worked, that's why I have half your pension in my poker winnings."

"I won't ask Rick, but knowing you this has to be serious for you to time it out for Martha and Alexis to be away, watch your six, you never know who is out there still"

"Same to you Roy, and discreetly pass this number to Ryan to call me Monday, it has to be before 8:00 AM or after 7:00 PM and that is non-negotiable."

"Well my timer is about to go off, don't do anything stupid Roy, you won't get my location anyway. See you when I can Cap"

Rick looks at his watch, he better hustle if he's going to be on time for Trey and Gregg meeting at 6:00. He slips into the Penthouse, thinking she was still occupied in her quarters but in reality, she had been ready and waiting for his return, things just didn't seem, right between them and she had to try to make it better if she could.

He slips into his room and locks the door, wow, that was unusual, he always left the door unlocked but she couldn't question it, after all she was the one pushing for more individual privacy, she was the one who turned down his offer to know how things were going for him in his treatment. At exactly 5:55 PM Rick emerges looking like he was going to an Awards Ceremony,

"Wow you clean up nice Rick, and in record time," Trey tries to joke to get the conversation started.

"Thanks, you look beautiful, Shall We?" As he extends his arm to escort her, again, he typically has his arm around her waist or guiding her gently with a palm in the small of her back, little things she just now starts to notice, and truthfully miss.

As they head out the door, Trey, turns to kiss him, and he turns his head slightly, so she wound up with lips on his cheek.

"Rick, are you that angry with me, that you won't even let me kiss you?"

"I'm not angry at all Trey, I just don't want to start something that I really don't know how to proceed with. I mean you tell me in one breath that I have to get things with Beckett sorted out, and that I understood.

You also said that things between us would be unclear until you were sure I was over her, and yet you try to kiss me, so yes, I'm confused as to which Rick you want. Let's have a nice dinner with Gregg and if you want to discuss it more, we can do it later, OK?"

"I understand, I guess I am sending you mixed signals, I'm sorry Rick, I care about you, I think it's love, but I don't want to get hurt again, and I can't be a fill in, so you're right let's go to dinner and take it from there."

As they approach the lobby, Gregg stands to greet them, Rick makes the formal introductions, and Trey is surprised when Gregg takes her hand she has offered for a handshake and pulls her into a very gentle hug concluded with a sweet kiss on the cheek.

"I'm sorry Trey if my actions offend you, I'm just a hugger have been my whole life."

"No, you didn't offend me at all, surprise, but not offended at all."

Dinner goes well with lots of conversation, and Gregg spilling the beans on Rick and how they met, his generosity and then their continued friendship throughout the years. Rick seems shy, but Gregg is adamant about how Rick and his Mother had shaped his life, and he wouldn't be where it was today without them.

Rick is the perfect gentleman, throughout the evening and finally when things are winding down, he hugs Gregg, and wishes him safe travels. Gregg hugs Trey, perhaps a tad longer than Rick expected, or was he imagining things, well he had no claim, and she certainly didn't resist so let it go he tells himself.

The ride on the elevator back to the Penthouse was in silence, almost like without Gregg there, the reason to talk was gone. When the door to the suite closed,

"Rick, are you upset with me, I mean did I do something wrong tonight?"

"No, of course not, why would you think that Trey?"

"Well right after Gregg hugged me, I know we kinda took off on our own stories and excluded you, I'm sorry I didn't to mean to be rude, it was just so nice to be so natural and open with someone, I mean someone other than you, oh I'm making a mess of this I'm sorry."

"Trey, don't give it a second thought, Gregg is my best friend, I'm glad you like him he has a lot to offer and has a heart of gold."

"Rick, are you trying to push me away, to Gregg, don't you care for me anymore?"

"Trey, I think we agreed before we went downstairs to have more discussion about the mixed signals you were sending, Get things sorted with Beckett before we can even think of a relationship, then you try to kiss me, and wonder why I turn away, now you accuse me of trying to push you off to Gregg, who you obviously have a connection with and were very open with it.

I felt awkward at first then I remembered, you didn't want to commit to a relationship with me, so you are free to explore, and I have no claim. You know how I feel, you have to know by now, but you're right I do need to get other parts of my life in order. I told you once that if you found happiness with someone else, I would step aside, and that's still true today. I know Gregg, and I can bet you by now I have an email or a text asking me if we are an item or if he can pursue you, he would never go behind my back, nor I his."

Just at that time Rick's phone chirped, and sure enough it was a text from Gregg, first thanking them for a great evening then at the end Rick if you and Trey decide to go separate ways, please let me know, I found her to be extraordinary and would love a chance to talk to her in a different setting.

"Rick, he's nice but right now, I don't know what I want, I'm sorry I am making this so hard for you, but I'm being as honest as I can."

"I know Trey, believe me I know. It'll all work out but for now I think I'm going to turn in, we can decide if and or what you want to do tomorrow when we wake up, it's our first full day off."

"Do you still want to do something with me Rick, I mean I'm a mess, but I care about you, I really do,"

"I know Trey, but you'll have to figure out what Care means in your world, we have different meanings for the same word right now. Of course, I still want to do something, let's see what tomorrow brings, Good Night"

Trey starts toward him to kiss him Good Night, something they have done since the first night, but he's gone, and his door is closing softly behind him.

For the first night in a long time, Trey gives into the tears and cries herself to sleep, she's managed to hurt Rick, and now that is hurting her far more than any hurt, she has ever felt before. Why does Love have to be this complicated? Why do we always hurt the ones we love? She falls asleep as she tries to think of a way to make it up to Rick.

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **Chapter 14**

 **Previously**

 _Like I said things escalated, and Demming's captain filed a complaint, I never even presented it to Kate, just suspended her for three days while I tried to figure this shit out. Then out of the blue, right after I get back from a Royal ass chewing from Boyle and Weldon, I find requests for transfers from both Espo and Ryan. I couldn't approve or tell anyone up the chain or Beckett's career is over. "_

" _So, you ordered her to counseling and kept the boys happy for a while anyway? What happens after she completes the training Roy, or the first time Kate acts like well Kate, what then?"_

 **Becketts Apartment**

 **Friday 7:00 AM**

Kate had gotten word from her Union Rep that the information Roy had relayed over the phone was indeed true, the 3 sessions with Dr. Carter Burke, and any additional sessions the Doctor may order **must** be completed within the 8 week timeline, or she could lose her paygrade permanently and be forced to even possibly resign.

With this considered, Dr. Burke had agreed to see her for he initial visit at 7:30 AM, early for him, but he was going out of his way to reduce the stress Kate was already feeling. Kate existed the cab at exactly 7:22 AM and walked up the stairs to Dr. Burke's office, where she rang the buzzer, since it was before normal office hours.

A kind looking Afro-American man came to greet her, "Good Morning, I'm Dr. Carter Burke and you must be Detective Kate Beckett."

"Yes, I am, and it's great to meet you, I want to thank you for seeing me so soon, as you know I must have your clean bill of health within 8 weeks or face grave disciplinary actions."

"Yes, I've read the official reports, what I'm interested in is what you did, and why you did what you did, were there triggers, were you under stress, etc. so why don't you get comfortable and we'll start with your story and please don't leave any detail out, as I said I have the official report."

For the next 25 minutes Kate walks Dr. Burke through the events of the two weeks leading up to the fateful day, her change of heart, and her break up with Demming that no knew about. She had just thought that Castle would be so glad she changed her mind that he would be excited about the news, then the party, the words exchanged, and her lack of concern, or perceived lack of concern about Castle by her team members and Management, and how she accepts responsibility for the poor attitudes on her team now.

"Thanks Kate take a sip of water while I make some notes here, and ponder the answer to this question since Mr. Castle seems to be the root of the conflict why haven't you reached out and told him the story, apologized and asked him to return to the station."

After a few minutes he nods to Kate, "Dr. Burke I have made every attempt to reach Castle, I called his cell phone it goes immediately to voice mail, I called his land line, I am blocked and now threatened with prosecution if I call again, I called his cell phone, and well, I*"

Dr. Burke see's her struggling, "Go on Kate, everything is confidential here, and what is said between us is protected by Doctor /Patient confidentiality laws.

"Well Dr. Burke, it would be easier if you listened to my worst moment, rather than describing it, as she hits play on her wav player, she has saved the download to her phone, and as she plays it, bows her head.

Finally, after what seems an eternity, the tape stops, and Kate looks up, to see kindness in Doctor Burke's eyes.

"Kate when I said I had the file, I meant the entire file, including that tape but thank you for stepping forward and playing it on your own volition, ownership of wrong doing is key."

"Thanks Dr. Burke, I had a few beers at the party where Rick didn't show, I found out later of course he was in that massive traffic jam, and then when I went home I didn't eat, but chose the Vodka bottle to get enough strength to call and confront him, what the end result was is what I just played for you."

"Have you been successful in reaching Mr. Castle at all, or what is the current status of that?"

"Dr. Burke, that's the crazy part of this whole mess, Rick had been angry at me before, even over more important matters, but he NEVER has shut me out, blocked me from his building, his phone, the only way anyone can contact him is through his agent Paula Haas, even his publisher must go through her.

I got through to her, and I know she relayed a message of apology to him, his response was "tell her I received her voice mail I am working on a proper response to it, I'm sorry I was such a burden to everyone there," and no matter how many more texts I send to Paula to send to him, there is no answer."

"Do you think Ms. Haas is being truthful when she tells you she passed along the messages?"

"Doctor in my line of work I deal with some of the best liars in this world, but yes, I know Paula has done what she could, she loves him and wants him to be happy even if it's not with her, she told me that was why he trusted her, and not me."

"Kate you say you have tired all forms of communication to apologize and to ask forgiveness, I heard, text, voice mail, cell phone, land line, building visit, did I miss anything?"

"No Doctor, like I said, I have tried everything, in all forms."

"Kate I'm surprised that you are missing the most obvious,"

"I don't understand Doctor, what have I missed, how can I make this right?"

"Write a letter Kate, one from your heart, and write it as if you were speaking to him across from you, don't worry about the format, spelling, or punctuations, what you really need to be sure is that it contains the same message you would convey if he were in his office at the Loft and you were talking to him, one on one."

"Doctor, I am terrible at writing letters, I mean I don't know what to say,"

"Did you just listen to what I described? "He reached over and played a small recorder back to give her instructions once again.

"This is not going to be easy Kate, and it's not something that will be quick, I expect to review your progress in our next session, unfortunately we are out of time for today.

Please make an appointment for next week on your way out, and Kate, if you get stuck on the letter, I am always available at this 7:30 time slot once you arrange it."

Kate stops by and makes an appointment for the first appointment of the morning next Wednesday, no sense pissing Montgomery off any more than he is already, and then thinks to herself, write a Fucking letter, her, who could hardly think of something to write for a Birthday or Anniversary Card, this is going to be tons of fun.

She has two more days to serve on her suspension, so what else has she got to do, her normal chores had already been completed, some twice out of boredom. As she walks out of Doctor Burke's office, she recognizes the coffee shop where Rick gets, well used to get, their morning coffees. As she enters, she takes in the aroma's that only freshly ground coffee beans could emit. When she places her order, the young lady stares at her for a second,

"Is there anything wrong Miss, I mean you are staring?"

"I'm very sorry, one of our regular customers orders the very same drink every morning and we haven't seen him in a week, it just made us think of Mr. Rook and hope he is OK, he never missed a day, always smiling and so generous, it's strange for him just to vanish like that. He would tell us if he had to travel, think he was a Consultant of some sort, anyway I'm rambling, your order will be right up, I'm very sorry"

"Thanks, and I hope your friend Mr. Rook is safe and returns soon, I'm sure it was just last-minute change in plans, he'll be back soon I'm sure of it." Kate thinks to herself, where the hell is, he, and how can one man have impacted so many people and I was so blind. He didn't treat anyone different, they were all important to him, equally, whether they were homeless on the street or some dignitary he had met.

She allowed her mind to go back to the day she met Ca, Rick, and all of the kind acts he had done for her and others, as she walks to her apartment. By the time she reached her front door she has quite the list so she decided that would be the basis to write her letter from, all the good things he had done for so many, and her failure to see, or acknowledge and beg for forgiveness.

She was just beginning to see the depths of this man's heart, how deeply he loved was also the depth he could hurt and she's pretty sure she did a great job in pushing him as low as he could be. Why? Even asking herself she couldn't answer the question.

Something about him made her feel different than other men had made her feel, what was it? Safe, Secure and totally loved in the few moments she had allowed him inside the fortress walls? That was it and it scared her to death, what if she gave in and then he took that feeling away, she wouldn't be able to cope, so better not to even start. Well on with the letter ***

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada**

 **7:00 AM Saturday**

Trey had awakened and quietly showered and dressed, she wanted to show Rick that she did care about him by having room service send up breakfast, which she would serve to him in bed. As she made her way quietly out to the Den area, she saw a piece of paper laying on the table with a Rose in a single vase on top to hold it in place.

" _Trey,_

 _I couldn't sleep, so I went down to the gym to work off some stress, the gift shop had this rose in the window, so I had to get it for you, hope you like it. Don't make anything out of it, I needed a paperweight for this note anyway. I've had all my mail forwarded to a PO Box here so I am multi-tasking by running to the Post Office and back, should be enough to get this stress monkey off my back and allow me to be a decent companion for you during what ever we do today, that is if you still want to. I understand if you don't. Anyway, I hope the noise from me leaving this morning didn't wake you,_

 _Be Back Soon,_

 _Rc"_

Trey is struck, with first the note, then looking closer, he had never been anything to her but Rick, yet the signature was Rc probably from initialing so many documents as Richard Castle, it had become his default signature for matters not close to his heart.

Was that how he felt now? Didn't she matter or was it that he was now, in safe mode to protect his own damaged heart? Did she really misjudge his feelings that badly? It seemed the better shape they were becoming, understanding her motives and actions, in her eyes, the further apart they had drifted in Ricks.

She returned to her room, and softly sobbed as she lay on her bed, remembering all of the hurt, and pain her past relationships had brought to her, and now had she done this to Rick? Why did it hurt so much about how he felt? Duh, I think I love him, as the realization finally dawned on her,

He was willing to let go of everything to be with her 10 days ago, but she had instilled doubt, and worry, now throw in flirting, and yes if she would be truthful she did flirt with Gregg, his best friend. It felt good to feel like a woman men desired, willing to battle over as if a spoil to the victor of a war. Now she felt stupid, and even more confused, and pretty sure Rick would not be her Rick again for a long time, if ever, and she had no one to blame but herself.

She heard the door close then the door to Rick's suite close, hurriedly applying makeup to conceal her watery, red eyes she walked out to the Den, still no Rick. Enough of this, it's Saturday he promised to spend time with me and damn it he's going to starting now.

She knocks on his bedroom door, expecting him to be sweaty and breathing from his run, as the door opens, he is neither

"Hey Trey, sorry did I wake you?"

"Actually no, I was up early trying to surprise you with breakfast in bed, and found your note, Thank you for the rose, it's beautiful. I thought you went for a run to the post office, why aren't you al sweaty and icky?"

"I showered in the gym, after I got back, and thanks for the thought, sorry I spoiled it"

"Well Rick, it seems like I've spoiled more than a breakfast in bed surprise, I feel like I have broken us, the us that faced this nightmare together. I'm sorry, I was weak, I know it must feel like you're staying with two identical twins who have exact opposite values, and for that I'm sorry as well."

"No Proble*"

"Rick, please don't tell me no problem, there is a big problem, well for me, I miss my Rick, the one who had my back, and knew me better than I knew myself. I thought I was doing the right thing when I told you we couldn't move forward till you took care of your feelings, turns out that I do love you, more than I knew. I'll take any part of you that you'll give me."

Rick hangs his hand, and sadly looks into her eyes,

"Trey, I've had my heart broken by every woman I've ever loved, you included, and now I just can't put myself out there like that. I do Love you but am I in love with you? How can I be when we both know that there are unresolved feelings for someone else, and I won't be the one to make you feel like I have recently.

I'll still be your Rick, I still have your back, and I still will do anything in this world to make you happy, BUT you were right, let's hold off with anything more, at least for now."

Trey begins to sob, "I've ruined the only chance I ever had, me and*

Rick pulls her into him kissing her gently and sweetly, then just holds her as she sobs, but all the tears in the world couldn't wash away the feelings of hurt, disappointment and depression he was feeling about one New York Detective at the moment.

We'll see Trey, we'll see.

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Dropped Call

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

 **A/N This chapter may be pushing the envelope of the skill level of our Detective, BUT please indulge me the activity to get the story moved to the next plot point. It's fiction, so comments about proper titles, procedures and especially referring to canon are being ignored, this again is AU, Alternate Universe, so just go with it please** **.**

 **Chapter 15**

 **Previously**

 _She was just beginning to see the depths of this man's heart, how deeply he loved was also the depth he could hurt and she's pretty sure she did a great job in pushing him as low as he could be. Why? Even asking herself she couldn't answer the question._

 _Something about him made her feel different than other men had made her feel, what was it? Safe, Secure and totally loved in the few moments she had allowed him inside the fortress walls? That was it and it scared her to death, what if she gave in and then he took that feeling away, she wouldn't be able to cope, so better not to even start. Well on with the letter ***_

 **Beckett's Apartment**

 **Saturday Evening**

Kate had fought off the idea of writing a letter to Castle, well Rick since she had arrived home, from Dr. Burkes. She had gone to Brunch with her Dad, met Maddie for a completely unneeded shopping trip, and finally had a drink and appetizers with Lanie as she waited for her date, (it was Espo who was she trying to kid, Kate had even saw him trying to hide from the other side of the bar, oh well let them keep it fresh) and now she was finally home and out of excuses.

Well I guess it's time, as she gathered her legal pad and pencil, knowing that this would be just one of many drafts before she was satisfied showing it to Dr. Burke on Wednesday. No sense wasting the good stationary until she had a final copy she could send, once she found out from Paula where? Another problem she hadn't thought about, where the hell was, she going to send it once she did complete it. Well, I'll deal with that later, I have to show Dr. Burke I am following instructions to get back my job.

Dear Castle, then she erased Castle and added Rick and so it went for several hours, the more she wrote, the less resentful she felt, and the more she missed the man who would move heaven and earth if she asked, how stupid had she been.

 _Dear Rick,_

 _I'm sure I am the last person you expected a letter from, even more that it contains my heartfelt apology, and me begging you to forgive me for the childish behavior I displayed, over and over till it finally pushed you over the edge. This is my fault, no one else, and I know you hate me now, and I can't blame you, I gave you no reason to feel anything else. I am sure you know of the disaster at the precinct by now, and once again, I can take credit for most if not all of the disharmony there. It seems I have a knack for making people feel small, useless, and to push my own insecurities on others._

 _It was said that only the weak talk badly of others, hoping to bring them to the level of despair they felt, I can relate to that since I treated you, among others with treatment I am so ashamed of. I won't use any excuse except to say, I was afraid of you Rick, you see you did something to me that I haven't experienced in years. **You made me feel** , the good, bad, happy and sad and if I'm being honest like I want to be, __you made me feel wanted and appreciated as a woman_ _, not just a cop but more._

 _It's easy to keep one foot out the door with men you don't feel anything for, and when I said you think you know me but you don't, I was referring to the fear I live with every day. The fear that you will make me want to live life again, to have to commit to someone, which will make it easier for me to feel hurt and pain once again. I think I know the pain I caused because when I stop, and re-visit the day my life changed forever, a hurt I carry with me deep inside took over, that's how I must have made you feel, for which I'm so sorry._

 _Rick, I can't say I'm sorry enough to you, to Demming, to all of my colleagues and to my profession, I caused each of you hurt and embarrassed the role I have fought hard to keep honorable for the last 10 years._

 _I owe you the greatest apology, since I know your hurt as I saw it get deeper and deeper each day, but I allowed my fear to try to drive you away. I never wanted to drive you away from me completely, just away from my heart. The day you left, and I knew you weren't coming back was one of the worst days I have had since my Mom was killed. Whether you know it or not, I know I didn't, but you had **already made me feel** , made me look forward to life, to you, and now I have pushed you to where I don't even know where you are, God I am so sorry._

 _I know I'm not good showing my emotions and I don't let people in, but Rick, I am asking two questions. Can you forgive me? I am truly sorry and will be till the day I die. The second question is perhaps a surprise, again, it took hours of wrestling with myself but I'm putting myself on the line, opening myself up for all of the hurt, rejection, embarrassment I know I deserve,_

 _Can you, and even if you can will you love me as much as_ _ **I know I love you**_ _? Yes, I said it,_ _ **I love you**_ _and I have for I don't know how long. If you don't feel the same I'll understand, I know you have been treated horribly by me, which I can never undo, but I promise you, if you let me, I will prove to you every day_ _ **I love you.**_

 _Rick, just in case you think this is a ploy to get you to forgive me to get my position back, I will resign my position, if you ask me to, I have already taken down the board, the one only you know about, you have convinced me that living is worth so much more than dying for a cause._ _PLEASE_ _Rick, I need to speak to you, I know I don't deserve anything but if you love me as much as I think you do,_ _PLEASE_ _don't keep me shut out of your life._

 _I know you pretty well too, and I am afraid that something is wrong, deadly wrong Rick, I just sense it, and if I don't get a chance to talk to you, I will never forgive myself if something happens to you. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, but I am asking, make that begging you, PLEASE, one call, 5 minutes to tell you I love you and hear your voice._

 _I am going to say I will see you soon, rather than Good Bye, because I am asking you, PLEASE come back to me, let me prove these aren't just words. Till then please know you hold my heart in your hands, I have played my last game, I am here waiting for you when you are ready,_

 _I love You,_

 _Always,_

 _Kate,_

 _PS. I started this letter as a requirement from my Psychiatrist, but the more I wrote, the more I found out, I really do love you, and I gave in to fear, yeah, your extraordinary role model is nothing more than an afraid little girl, when it comes to relationships, and letting my heart get broken. I know now that I would rather deal with a broken heart after trying, than wonder IF ONLY someday, I hope you give me one last chance to prove it to you, XoXo KB_

Kate re-reads the final version as she sips a glass of wine from the last bottle Rick had brought over, and as she reads she realizes she may have to prepare that no matter how much Rick HAD loved her, she could have crossed a line that there is no return. As she transfers the letter from the yellow legal pad, she can't stop the tears from falling, some watermarking sections of the letter, but she can't help it. The more she thinks she may never see Rick again the harder she sobs.

The fellow officers had kidded them about being connected, and now Kate was feeling her partner, and the man she had just admitted she loved with all of her heart was in danger somewhere and she had no way of reaching him. He would never let her slip away from him, if roles were reversed, she had to reach him. She started making a list of alias he had used or suggested recently. Since she was on suspension, she couldn't go to the precinct, at least till Monday.

Desperate times called for desperate measures so she decided to take the risk, she had remote access to the NYPD Data bases and only someone running or checking an audit log would even know her password was used to log on, IF Roy had taken the easy way out and not suspended her privileges, which she was hoping he hadn't. Once the system booted up, she prepared for a long night, coffee, snacks and she made a nature call before she got started. She logged in, a moment delay, "come on come on, YES" as the system logged her in. She started running financials, phones even to Paula, and Gina. She converted a serving tray for breakfast into a mini murder board to track her leads.

About 4 hours into her search she had come across some things she didn't like, no sign of Rick, just as she thought but there were some bread crumbs from his associates. She had Gregg DeLeaver marked as a college friend, and a hit on his financials revealed a one day stay at the Orion Hotel Toronto Canada, Air Canada Flight booked the same day, and returned the next afternoon.

In researching his profession, she dropped her coffee, Oncologist, participating in trial medication test subjects, in Toronto Hospital. Another receipt was for party of three at the hotel restaurant, parties listed were Rook, Bolin and Doctor on the miscellaneous section of the billing statement electronically processed the same day. Oh God, No, NO NO, IT couldn't be not Rick, maybe she was jumping to conclusions, but she had to know.

She never bothered to look at the time, but called Gina Cowell,

"Gina Cowell, how can I help you detective?"

"Gina do you know a Gregg DeLeaver from Rick's younger days. Does that name make sense to you at all?"

"Yeah, he was Rick's best friend in College, he went on to be a Doctor, in fact he's or at least he was Rick's physician, Why, what's going on?"

"Maybe nothing, but I just have a feeling something is wrong with Rick, and I am trying to do whatever I can to track him down."

"Well good luck with that Kate, Paula is either just as much in the dark as we are or she's just being a super B,"

"What kind of doctor was Gregg when he was Rick's doctor Gina?"

"He was an internist, but I think he was working on another specialty but not sure which."

"Well when he traveled to Canada where did he stay when you two were married, if you remember?"

"God, so many places, he loved Quebec City, and the old hotels but no matter where he went, he always spent at least one night at the Orion Hotel in Toronto, regardless if it was on the agenda or not."

"Thanks Gina, I'm not sure if I know anymore or not, but when or if I do find out anything, I'll call you,"

"Thanks Kate, people think I hate him, it's just the opposite, I love him like I know you do when you finally let go and admit it. He is one of the sweetest men I know, just because our marriage didn't work doesn't mean the love died"

"Thanks Gina,"

"Kate?"

"Yes?"

"Good luck and I hope you find him safe, for all of us"

"Thanks"

Kate immediately went to Air Canada website and booked a flight out to Toronto, for 5:30 AM the next day, if she found him, she really didn't care if the Department fired her, Rick was more important than any damn job. She packed, and booked a room at the Orion Hotel, and carefully folded her letter to Rick, after scanning a copy to show Doctor Burke on Wednesday.

She called Kevin, which was protocol since he was acting lead detective, and left a brief voice mail that she would be out of town, possibly need Monday off, following a lead on Rick, then shut her phone off.

She didn't bother to even try to sleep, rather just double checked her credentials, badge, gun, and passport. She prayed a silent prayer that Rick wouldn't be there or if he were it was for one of his pleasure trips as Gina described.

When she got to the airport, she was early enough to be bumped to the earlier flight and took off within 25 minutes of arriving at the airport. Toronto was a short flight from New York, so short in fact the Flight Attendants had only time to offer a quick beverage and then they were preparing for landing. The flight landed at 5:10 AM, before she was even scheduled to depart on the original flight.

One advantage of early flights was no traffic, she hopped into a cab and was at the Orion Hotel before 6:00 AM. As she approached the check in counter, she had a feeling, just one that she got when Rick was around, and as she took two steps down to the area, there he was, coming out of the gym.

"Rick, can you give me one minute please?" she called loudly, He turned to face the voice, that voice that haunted his dreams nightly if he were truthful,

Kate? What are you doing here?


	16. Chapter 16

Dropped Call 

**by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

A/N This chapter may be pushing the envelope of the skill level of our Detective, BUT please indulge me the activity to get the story moved to the next plot point. It's fiction, so comments about proper titles, procedures and especially referring to canon are being ignored, this again is AU, Alternate Universe, so just go with it please.

 **Chapter 16**

 **Previously**

In researching his profession, she dropped her coffee, Oncologist, participating in trial medication test subjects, in Toronto Hospital. Another receipt was for party of three at the hotel restaurant, parties listed were Rook, Bolin and Doctor on the miscellaneous section of the billing statement electronically processed the same day. **Oh God, NO, NO, NO** , IT couldn't be not Rick, maybe she was jumping to conclusions, but she had to know.

One advantage of early flights was no traffic, she hopped into a cab and was at the Orion Hotel before 6:00 AM. As she approached the check in counter, she had a feeling, just one that she got when Rick was around, and as she took two steps down to the area, there he was, coming out of the gym.

"Rick, can you give me one minute please?" she called loudly, He turned to face the voice, that voice that haunted his dreams nightly if he were truthful,

 **Kate? What are you doing here?**

 **Orion Hotel**

 **Toronto Canada, Sunday 5:50 AM**

Kate? What are you doing here?

"Rick, I tracked you down, I know, Gregg the study, please just give me 5 minutes, and if you don't want to see me I'll go back to New York, but PLEASE I need to tell you something very important?"

"How did you find me, I left no clues for anyone, not even Paula knows where I am, did you tell anyone else where you were coming Kate?" as a panic looks overtakes his face and his color goes ashen,

"No Rick, I left Ryan a voice mail just telling him I may need tomorrow off, for personal business, that I was out of town, but I didn't say where."

"Well if this isn't the pot calling the kettle black, you accuse me of snooping into your personal life, yet here you stand Detective, Why? Why do you even care?" Rick has a look of hurt, disdain, disappointment, Kate can't read it, but it wasn't a glad to see you look for sure.

"Rick, can we go somewhere more private than a hotel lobby, Please? I'm only asking you give me 5 minutes, I know you hate me, and I know you've moved on and have a new woman in your life, but I have to get some things straight between us and I don't want to have to shout across a hotel lobby, PLEASE?" Kate is almost begging now, and is fighting tears from falling, as she looks at Rick, thinner by at least 30 pounds from the last time she saw him,

"Kate turn off your phone and disable GPS, it's bad enough you penetrated my location, but I sure as hell don't want anyone to know where I am," Rick spit out with the word anyone especially distasteful,

Kate reached into her purse and showed Rick the phone was off, "I did that before I left New York Rick, I know you're pissed I'm here but I just couldn't let it go, I had to talk to you after the way I left it with that*"

"What Kate, your Academy Award wining imitation of Charley Sheen leaving a voice mail?"

Kate hangs her head and just nods, "Come on, I know a place where there's always quiet, especially at this hour."

They proceed to the elevators, she wants to say something, but Rick looks at her with then Not Now look, so she holds her thoughts. Once they exit the elevator at the Penthouse suites, Rick leads her to a small stairway where one floor up is a door to the roof, he even has a door stop sitting by it meaning he must spend a great deal of time up there.

"So, Detective, you wanted some place quiet to talk, I think we have it here" as he motions to an outside patio set with table and 4 chairs and an umbrella for rain or direct sun.

"Thanks Rick, first thing is this, don't read it yet, wait till I am done then it's your letter, one that has things in it I should have said and apologies for things I never should have done," as she hands him the letter she had so carefully guarded since she wrote it. Rick recognizes the stationary, it was a birthday present the first year they worked together, he hadn't known her long so opted for a safe gift, which she loved.

"OK, so you wrote a letter, what's that supposed to mean Kate, I mean why are you here, why did you spend the time, resources and money to find me, do you want to gloat, or rub another man in my face?

And what did you mean by I have moved on and already and have another woman in my life, where did that crap come from? Oh, let me guess, you spoke to Paula, who talked to a friend here and she as usual have us all coupled up and ready to marry, right?"

"Rick, first of all WHY I'm here is in the letter, I know it will shock and surprise you, it even did me. You know how the boy's kid us about connected souls when we finish each other's sentences? Well I have a feeling something is wrong with you, physically and Rick, I can't live with myself if you don't know how sorry I am for what I did.

Yes, I spoke to Paula, who is still madly in love with you and so protective of you, she mentioned that when she relayed my apology, that it had happened when I had too much to drink, that a woman spoke up and hated me, I think she said Cop or no Cop she would kick my ass for treating you this way if she met me."

Rick looks a little less stern, that perhaps it is listening just a bit, "Rick, I did the research and I know what kind of Doctor Gregg DeLeaver is, and I also know he has seen you for dinner along with Ms. Bolin, it wasn't hard to find out the clinical trial going on at the hospital. Please, I'm here for you, talk to me, tell me how I can help?"

"Now you want to help. Do you feel sorry that the funniest kid on the playground is human and contracted a sickness? Did you just now realize that I hurt, bleed, and have feelings that are easily trampled on just like you? Tell me Detective if I had done this to you, would you even be standing here now or would you have pulled one of your patented it's my life, you don't know me routines and left me in the cold? What the hell do you want from me Kate, you have my soul what's left for you to destroy?" Rick is almost in tears when he is done,

"Rick, you hate me, I get it, and you deserve to. I did nothing to show you how special you are to me and have been since we met. I hope once you read what I wrote, it will explain what I always fuck up or don't phrase correctly when we do talk, it always comes out wrong, and I end up hurting you even more.

Why Now? Why do I want to help? The man I love never had to face Cancer before, and no matter how bad it is, I want to be with him, every minute of the day to help him in whatever way I can.

I want to spend every moment either of us have left secure in his arms, or him in mine, I've wasted too much time already, and now I know I have probably ruined my one chance at my true love, my one and done, so I'm going to my room, to allow you to read my letter. IF I don't hear from you, then I promise Rick, I will be out of your life forever.

I can't say that I will be happy if you have chosen someone new, I won't, and I'm done lying, but I understand, this is all my fault. Just know that no matter what you do, where you go, whatever it takes Richard Castle, I will be by your side IF you let me. I love you, kinda sucks to have to say it under these circumstances, but you have to know."

Rick stands there with his mouth open, not only from the revelation that Kate has professed her love for him, but the forceful way she took charge, and her sincere apology, no matter how rude he was to her, she returned it with kindness, not the old Kate at all.

Kate starts walking toward the door, when she hears

"Kate?"

She turns and answers, "Yes Rick?"

"Thanks for coming, for finding me, I know you want us to start now at this moment, but there is something I need to do first. Oh, and for your knowledge Trey and I have not slept together, well we shared a bed for the first two nights, but not intimately, she is a patient in the Cervical Cancer Trial. I have one room of the suite, she has the other."

"Rick, thanks for telling me, you didn't have to, but Thanks. Oh, so you know, I never went away with Demming, seems my Love was tied up somewhere else, so I spent the weekend doing all kinds of stupid shit to try to get him to hate me. I think I almost succeeded."

"I could never hate you Kate, hate the things you did, the things you put me through, yes, but hate you, Never," as he walks closer to her, and then brushes a stray tear from her eye.

That's all it takes till she is kissing him trying to pour out the love she has held in for two years into each kiss, he doesn't fight her, in fact he deepens the kiss and adds a great deal of tongue till they both have to break for air, "I Love You" is said simultaneously, and they break away with a smile. Then Kate begins to sob, first softly then harder.

"Hey, I've had a lot of responses to my kisses but never have I made a beautiful woman cry before" he smiles that deep smile, trying to cheer her up as he lifts her head gently and kisses away her tears.

"I'm sorry Rick, I guess it just hit me, you're here fighting Cancer and I am back in New York upset because you didn't show up at your party so I could tell you I wanted to go to the Hampton's with you. So Selfish, like I always am."

"Hey, stop that right now, What, you were going to go to the Hampton's with me, that was your surprise that I ruined?"

She nods her head then pulls him in with a tight hug,

"Rick, I'm so sorry, I'm so very, very, sorry, I should have just accepted like I wanted to when you asked, I was such an idiot."

"We both were Kate, we both were acting like idiots. I don't want you to leave me, can you give me a few minutes to read your letter, but please, don't leave, OK?"

"I'll be right here Rick, I promise."

Rick walks over to a portion of the roof closer to a night light and reads Kate's letter, he wipes his eyes a few times, but finally he re-folds it carefully and walks toward Kate.

"Kate, that letter was beautiful, I never knew you to be so open and honest, you asked me two questions, I have your answers, **YES** I can and do forgive you and **YES** I do still love you with all of my heart, no matter how hard I fought to get you off my mind you were with me, even on the toughest days."

"Rick", as she steals kisses, seems like she can't stop kissing him now, "where do we go from here, I mean it's up to you, but Babe, I want to be with you, all the way, no matter what comes, so I'm asking please don't send me back to New York to have you face this alone, Please?"

"Kate, it would mean taking time, I mean a lot of time away, from your job, I can't ask you to do that for me"

"Rick, you're right, you can't so tell you what, I am going to resign Monday and be with you till we kick Cancer's Ass, you might be strong enough to do it without me, but I'm not without you."

"What about your Mom's case? I mean I can't ask you to give that up."

"You didn't but Rick, I already did, being with you is what Mom would have wanted, we'll get justice for her, let's get you well first, please Babe?"

"Well Kate, (as he pauses a long minute), OK, you're here with me till we kick this or get kicked. After I speak to her I want you to meet Trey, and talk to her, she's had a tough life and I think she was trying to latch on to the first secure friend she had, oh by the way Gregg, my best friend and Doctor is interested so I don't think she will be too broken hearted. We talked about you, and how you are and would always be my one True Love."

They walk down to the Penthouse to allow Rick to have one of the most difficult conversations in his life, he's never been good at hurting people. Kate decides she is going to check in and Rick insists it's the other Penthouse that just came open, since he would be joining her soon, (he had already called and had her pre-checked in).

As he enters the suite, still in his gym clothes, Trey looks up from her breakfast, and says,

"I got worried about you, so I went down to the gym, was that Kate that you met to talk with Rick? I'm glad if it is, since Gregg wants to have dinner tonight either the three of us, or just he and I."

"Yes, sorry to worry you, but that was Kate, she tracked me down even with all of my precautions she's that good of a detective."

"Rick, remember when I got all clingy and you told me that you had to sort things out with Kate, then you seemed to get closer and it was I who pushed you away, especially after I flirted with Gregg at dinner?

Well it's working out the way it's supposed to, I told you I could never live as a substitute of fill in, and now I have a chance with someone who has a lot of the same good qualities as you."

"You mean you're not upset that things are going this well with Kate and me? I never wanted to hurt or lead you on,*"

"You didn't Rick, some of the things you said in your sleep were the most romantic words I ever heard, and when I realized they were for Kate, I knew you belonged with her. I was just trying to be a friend, sometimes I leaned too much on you to give you the wrong idea, but I'm not sorry for the times you held me, comforted me, and made me feel whole again, you opened the door for Gregg and I am so happy for us all."

"I do think the living arrangements have to change Trey," as he laughs, "This suite is yours for as long as you need it, and I'll be across the hall" as he opens the door and see's Kate outside,

"Kate, I'll be right over,"

"No Problem Babe, as she walks into the open door, "Hi Trey, I'm Kate, thanks for looking after him, when I was such an idiot,"

Trey smiles and says "Kate nothing went on, I mean*"

"I know Trey, but even if it did, it would have been my fault not Ricks and certainly not yours, I'm just glad he had you to lean on those first few days. I'm sorry I was such a Bitch that kept me from him, but I'm here now and I'm not leaving till this is over and he has kicked Cancer's Ass."

"I'm glad Kate, he talks in his sleep and the love talk he has for you, it might be worth your while to stay up one night or set a tape recorder, he adores you, and always will,"

Kate blushes a bit, then says "Thank You, Rick told me you were the one that put the ice water on any possibility of a you and him once you heard about me, most woman would have plowed away anyhow, so Thank You, it means a lot to me"

"I'd like to think we could be friends during the rest of this, and beyond, truth is Rick is my only friend, well now Gregg, but you know what I mean."

"Of course Trey, you'll find with Rick, once you're a friend he can't do enough for you, we both will be here for you, and I'm going to be accompanying you for treatment days, so I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all, it'll be nice to have a woman to share thoughts with, you know"

Kate smiles and nods then pulls Trey in for a hug, "You're going to beat this, you both are and I'm going to be right here with you when you do."

TBC One last chapter remaining, thought I could squeeze it in here but too much content. Thanks for the continued support, reads, and reviews, all greatly appreciated,

Tim


	17. Chapter 17

Dropped Call

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. _**NOTE: AU not canon**_

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

A/N This will hopefully wrap up the details from the prompt supplied by Kato769 and explain how our two got back together. Marlowe always said this was a love story, and for the first 5-6 years I believed it was. So many opportunities to develop life away from the precinct were missed, (IMHO) and this is just one scenario as I saw it. Thanks for the reads, reviews, follows and favorites. I am leaving the door open to a sequel, not right away, but that will depend on the reaction I get from you the readers, Thanks Again, hope you enjoyed, God Bless Tim

 **Chapter 17**

 **Previously**

"Rick", as she steals kisses, seems like she can't stop kissing him now, "where do we go from here, I mean it's up to you, but Babe, I want to be with you, all the way, no matter what comes, so I'm asking please don't send me back to New York to have you face this alone, Please?"

 **NYPD 12** **th** **Precinct**

 **Monday 6:35 AM**

Montgomery had just gotten to his office and had time to put down his case, and take one sip from his morning coffee when his phone rings, "God Damn it, this had better be good" he mutters to himself,

"Montgomery" he spits into the phone displaying his displeasure of being called at this hour.

"Captain, I'm sorry for the early call, but I wanted to reach you before you got all tied up in your day, I have some important news and a request Sir" Kate replied,

"Beckett? Why the hell are you calling me, you are reporting to Ryan for the next four weeks or did you forget?"

"No Sir, I didn't forget, but Sir, I won't be in to work for a while, I am exhausting my vacation and sick time for a family issues Sir."

"Kate what the hell do you mean family issue, your Dad is fine, I just saw him yesterday at the boats. What family issue are you talking about?"

"Sir, you know you can't ask me that, I have already filed the paperwork through HR to go on FMLA or the Family Leave Act, and this call is more a courtesy than a request, you've been my Captain a long time and putting the last few weeks aside I think we have grown close. Sir I wish I could tell you, but it is a family matter and I can't disclose any more than that."

Rick had walked in and didn't realize Kate was on the phone as he surprised her with her morning Coffee,

"Here you go Babe, Fresh and hot, and ohhh sorry didn't know you were on the phone, I'll just wait out here"

Kate flips her phone to speaker as they both hear "Beckett, was that Rick? Where the hell is, he and is, he all right?"

"Hi Cap, yes it's me and Kate tracked me down, off a bread crumb so small that I am so impressed with her skills and twice as angry at mine. I am Fi, well make that I'm better now than I was before she found me."

"Kate, you do know that if FMLA runs out, and you aren't ready to come back, you can always go on unpaid personal leave, you don't have to resign, I mean that is if you and Rick are a*"

"Roy, we are, as you started to say a couple, we both screwed up royally but I'm not letting her go now, so do what you have to do, but she's staying with me, **FOREVER and ALWAYS."**

"Rick, you and I go back a long time, why don't you two just get married and get it over with, My God, you've acted like a married couple for two years already and the only time either of you are happy is when you're with each other."

"Roy, I want to tell you something, Kate knows but no one, not even my Mother, or Alexis knows this, so holding this close, OK?"

"Rick, you are beginning to worry me, what the hell is going on? Of course, I won't say a word, that's your story to tell, AS long as you are completely honest with Kate, about everything"

"Roy, I am in Toronto in a Clinical Trial for a revolutionary cure for Cancer. I was diagnosed a few months ago, and just got into this trial where so far things are going well. The final answer won't be known for 3-4 months after the study, but all the markers are showing the treatment is working and I have reason to have high hopes.

AND as for your suggestion about Kate and me, well don't be surprised if she comes back to work with a new last name, IF I make it through this, and IF she will have me."

Kate has done a great job holding in her tears till she hears "if she will have me" then she completely breaks down.

"Roy, I'm not coming back until I know Rick is OK and even then I'm not sure I want to be away from him that long anymore, this has opened my eyes to how much little time any of us have, we'll call you with updates, but mark me out indefinitely, I need to be with Rick now" she speaks through her tears.

"Kate, go be with him, give him something to hold on for and to fight, and let him know that we all love him back here whether he works another case with us or not. The official story I am putting out is you are with a relative who is ill and exercising your FMLA, but Kate, don't let Lanie find out before you tell her, we all have to live here," he laughs

"OK Roy I understand and will do, talk soon" and then the line goes dead. Roy opens his middle drawer and takes out the bottle, adding a splash to his coffee, finally something good to drink to he smiles.

Rick turns to see Kate fighting but losing the battle to hold back her tears, "Rick PLEASE talk to me Babe, tell me everything, I want to know and believe me, as she takes his hands in hers and looks him in the eyes with a look he has never seen, I will be here, I'm not going anywhere I love you for what ever time you or I have left."

Rick pulls her into his lap, kissing her sweetly then kisses her tears away, then he get's a look on his face that Kate is concerned about, "Babe, are you OK, talk to me, please, Rick?"

"I'm sorry Kate, it was just something that Roy said, I need to tell you the whole story"

He told her about his time when he met Roy, he was working with the CIA, mostly because of someone had cleared the way, and he actually went through all the training as one of their full time agents would, including security clearance, weapons and hand to hand combat.

He was supposed to stay in the barracks but had managed to get on the convoy Roy was commanding and then all hell broke loose, that's when Roy was wounded and after he got his award for saving lives he was promptly shipped home because of his maverick ways.

"So now you know why Roy and Mayor Wheldon would allow me to tag along, Bob was under Roy's command at the time of the incident." Rick says sadly,

"I couldn't say anything, and I really shouldn't now but you know Roy gave me an order to tell you everything."

Kate just pulls him in and kisses his head, neck lips wherever she could "Oh Rick, I'm so sorry for all of the barbs, insults, I didn't know but I know they hurt you deeply, please forgive me"

"Hey, nothing to forgive, I got over it quickly"

"That's just it Rick, you shouldn't have to, I should have shown you the common courtesy you or any one working with us deserves, I'm sorry"

"Hey, I have to shower, we're meeting Try and Gregg for breakfast remember?"

"Of course, I'll be ready in 15 minutes," not bothering to tell Rick she had already showered and all she needed to do now was her makeup, which she decided to keep simple, Trey couldn't wear any so she would just do the minimum.

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **9:30 AM Monday**

Kate was nervous, no make that afraid, she seldom felt the fear she was holding in as Rick sat next to her, with Trey and Gregg sitting across as they waited for the sessions to begin.

Gregg picked up on Kate's nervousness, as she kept hold of Rick's hand, squeezing it tightly, almost like if she let go, he would go away.

"It's fine Kate, from what I've been told it's relatively painless, but you'll be able to see for yourself soon, I arranged for you to be with Rick and Trey in the treatment room, I think it'll do them both good."

"What about you Gregg, aren't you staying?"

"Only till it's time to catch my flight, I'll be back in a couple of days, seems like Trey needs a Doctor more than Rick does these days, since he has found his soul mate again."

"Again? I don't understand Gregg, we haven't been together before,"

"I didn't say that, but from the day he met you, the only subject he would talk about was you, maybe that's why Paula and Gina gave you such a hard time, they wanted what you could have had at any minute you said so. I'm sorry that was in the past and I shouldn't be bringing that up"

"No Gregg you should, I'll never know just how badly I destroyed Rick unless someone tells me, I promise you he's my world and I'm not leaving him now for anything."

Gregg flashed that big smile, and said, "I know, I see and so does he, I bet this week his results go way up off the chart, because you're here for him, nothing scientific about Love Kate, just keep loving him, he loves deeply and hurts twice as deep,"

Kate spent the entire day in the treatment room with Rick and Trey, bringing them warm blankets, cold water, and on their breaks cheered them up and acted like a cheerleader. She just smiled as Trey's head fought and fought, and finally drooped onto Rick's shoulder. Rick looked up at Kate in horror, and Kate smiled and whispered softly "It's OK, I know You Love Me, "and the smile returned to Rick's eyes.

After treatment on Monday's it had been their habit to order Room Service since they both were exhausted.

Kate helped Trey off the elevator and down the hall, and when she started to go into her suite, she was stopped,

"Trey, we have plenty of room, why don't you come over to our suite take a nap then we'll eat together, there's no need for you to be alone. Gregg said he was going to SKYPE you later, so I know you will want your suite then but please join us now."

"Thank you Kate, you know you were all that Rick talked about, and he was right, you're so loving and giving no wonder why he fell in love with you, no other woman has a chance with him as long as you are here. I hope to find love like that someday."

"Trey, I was a fool, but now that I see it you're right, and I'll never let him go again, and I'm sure you'll find your true love, looks like Gregg is quite taken with you already." She smiles

 **University Medical Center**

 **Toronto Ontario**

 **4 Weeks from start of treatment**

The day was one that Trey, Gregg, Kate, and Rick could hardly wait for. Each week the markers continued to improve for both Rick and Trey, and Gregg had been a frequent flyer visiting Trey at least 3 times a week, some weeks more.

Rick was finally called for his final checkup, but this time, he took Kate's hand, and said,

"Please Babe, I need you here with me for this, OK?"

A sweet kiss, and "Of course" Kate replied and was partly excited, partly worried, but she was anxious to find out if the man she loved was given the second chance in life that he had given so many others, her included"

Rick went through the routine he had grown accustomed to, but today was a little bit different, rather than the consultation, there was a video playing of the day he first checked in, Trey was with him, the film captured them registering then showed them as they had fell asleep one head leaning on the other, as the nurses covered them both with warm blankets.

The next part of the film, Rick saw Kate taking charge of not only his, but Trey's treatment as well, coaxing her to eat when she didn't want to, covering her, and him, kissing his head when he fell asleep and putting a pillow behind his head so his neck wouldn't hurt, all the little things he didn't know she had done, she never left his side.

He turned to look at her with tears in his eyes, "I never knew Babe, Thank You, for me, for Trey and for Gregg, I love you, I'm just sorry I'm such a bur*"

"Don't finish that sentence if you know what's good for you, I Love You Richard Castle, I have for longer than I can remember and I will do anything to keep you happy, anything" and the tears flow as he pulls her into his arms and embrace just holding her as she sobs.

A few minutes later the Doctor hit's play and there are the final numbers, Ricks are over the chart, almost as if he never had Cancer to begin with, his PSA numbers were those of a man with indications to watch for, not recovering from Prostrate Cancer.

As they view the numbers, it Rick who sobs this time, he just can't believe that four short weeks ago his life was in shambles and he had been handed life's cruelest blows ever.

"Rick, we won't have the definitive results for 3-4 months, but I am betting you come back as completely Cancer Free, Congratulations and PLEASE continue regular checkups with Dr. DeLeaver,"

"That's taken care of Doctor, thank you, I've made his appointments with Gregg personally for the next 4 months and I will drag him there if needed," Kate smiles through tear stained face, tears of joy, of love, and of thankfulness for second chances for both of them.

At the same time Rick was getting his results, Trey was receiving similar news with Gregg by her side, he had been there the entire week and from an outsider's point of view he was getting very serious about her.

As they enter the Lobby, Rick see's Trey first, as she runs and jumps into his arms throwing her arms around his neck and kissing his cheek, "I'm good how are you Rick?"

"The same Trey, but I think you better let me go before Gregg or Kate or both kick our asses" he laughs.

Kate smiles at him, "Rick of all the people in the world, I would never be jealous of Trey, she's been your partner in a fight that no one should ever have to go through, I'm glad you had each other. But Sister, let go of my man" and laughter fills the room,

It wasn't a final verdict, BUT it was the second chance, and this time life didn't drop the call, in fact it became a conference call among the closest of friends.

A/N Going to leave this as complete here. This could be revisited with a sequel if enough interest is shown. Heartfelt thanks to ALL who have read, reviewed, favored, or followed. To those I could not respond to personally, Thanks to you as well, and finally big tip of the cap and Thanks to Kato769 for the prompt, I hope I did you proud, we got quite the story from a dropped call. Looking for your prompts to write from, Thanks Tim


	18. Chapter 18

**Dropped Call**

 **by Castlefan6**

Authors Note: Castle missed his going away party because something unexpected came up and the Castle/Gina/Hamptons thing didn't happen etc. Castle assumes Beckett is with Demming and goes off the grid for several months. Would our favorite couple ever reconnect? From a prompt from Kato769. **_NOTE: AU not canon_**

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

A/N This will hopefully wrap up the details from the prompt supplied by Kato769 and explain how our two got back together. Marlowe always said this was a love story, and for the first 5-6 years I believed it was. So many opportunities to develop life away from the precinct were missed, (IMHO) and this is just one scenario as I saw it. Thanks for the reads, reviews, follows and favorites. I am leaving the door open to a sequel, not right away, but that will depend on the reaction I get from you the readers, Thanks Again, hope you enjoyed, God Bless Tim

 **Chapter 18**

 **Previously**

"Rick", as she steals kisses, seems like she can't stop kissing him now, "where do we go from here, I mean it's up to you, but Babe, I want to be with you, all the way, no matter what comes, so I'm asking please don't send me back to New York to have you face this alone, Please?"

A/N Going to leave this as complete here. This could be revisited with a sequel if enough interest is shown. Heartfelt thanks to ALL who have read, reviewed, favored, or followed. To those I could not respond to personally, Thanks to you as well, and finally big tip of the cap and Thanks to Kato769 for the prompt, I hope I did you proud, we got quite the story from a dropped call. Looking for your prompts to write from, Thanks Tim

Looking for feedback, how many want a sequel to this story, I got a lot of response initally so just going to put this out there to see if there is still interest.


End file.
